Parenting is not for the faint of heart. It’s the hardest, yet most rewarding thing we can ever do. Some parent their biological children. Other’s adopted children. Still others will parent their children’s children or will serve as parents to a child who needs someone to look up to. No matter how you parent or who you’re called to parent, your job is the same raise them to send them.
From the time they were first born, I knew this day would come. When they couldn’t feed themselves and all they did was want to be held, I knew today would come but didn’t give it a second thought. I wanted them to be able to do something, anything really. They slept, cried, ate, needed changed and looked cute. Little did I know this day would be here so soon. We were raising them to send them.
When they hit the school years they were a handful to say the least. They teased and tormented each other and us. They played tricks on teachers because no one knew one from the other. They had their serious moments and their just plain goofy and silly ones. I fear I took too much of that time for granted. I wasn’t patient enough nor loving enough in a way they needed me to be. I overlooked the things that were probably more important to them than I realized.
We did throw the ball and play video games together. I remember letting them help me wash the car and mow the lawn. They were by my side through most of their days at home. Even though they had each other, they both just wanted to be where I was. When they were sick they wanted me to stay home. They wanted me to hold them when they were tired. Even when they were throwing up they wanted me by their side. At the time I didn’t like that much but today I’d honestly do it in a heart beat because today we’ve raised them to send them.
When they hit high school and blazed their own trail, we tried to hold them back a little from making massively stupid mistakes. Don’t worry we all make these mistakes. I wanted to protect them as much and as long as I could. We encouraged them. Challenged them. Reprimanded them. We let them fall then picked them up and set them on the road again. We were there to make sure they didn’t hit bottom too hard because we wanted them to learn from the pain. We were raising them to send them.
The past few weeks have been the best of my life. We’ve spent some great time together. I cherished each of the moments. From the 25 plus hour car ride to throwing the frisbee or talking video games each of these are memories I’ll hold onto forever. The hike to the top of Little Devil’s Tower or the nonstop chatter about politics, guns and knives were all things I will not soon forget. They’ve been the greatest times that I just don’t want to end but we’re raising them to send them.
These days have been the greatest but also the worst days of my life because I know what’s coming. The raising is ending and the sending is beginning. One of them will go far and one will stay closer for now but we’re still sending them both. We’ve done what we could and for good or bad the raising portion is done. It’s now time to send them.
To My Boys:
I couldn’t be more proud of who you are and what you’re going to do in life. You are strong men of God. You have a foundation that I pray will never erode or break down. Build on that foundation.
Lucas, as you make final preparations to head off to be prepared to defend this country, even for those who don’t appreciate your service, remember where you started. Remember your fun-loving side. Make people laugh. Remember your faithful side. Show people Jesus. Stay strong when you are pushed to your limits. Keep your nose clean and your chin up. Stay safe and always watch your six. Stay true to you. Dad couldn’t be more proud of you!
Matthew, as you move to college and fight for us all by defending our technology infrastructure, know you are making a difference. You brother gets recognition for his service and I want you to know yours is equally important. Remember your serious side and how you get the job done. Work hard. Be diligent. Overcome the way you have with every challenge you’ve faced so far. Be focused and confident in who you are because you are enough! Dad couldn’t be more proud of you!
Remember the raising moments we shared. Remember that whatever the next stage of your life brings you always have a place to call home wherever we are. While the raising is ending and the sending begins, you can always come home.
To Parents and Parents to be:
Your goal is clear and yet challenging. You are called to raise them to send them. Some of you will send your children near and others will send them far. Remember this is what you were called to do. Your vocation as a parent is so vital. Be there for your children. Laugh with them. Cry with them. Hold them. Dance with them. Play ball with them. You don’t have to be their friend but you are called to love them and cherish them. Raise them well because one day you’ll send them too. But be sure to send them ready to battle the world around them. Send them to stand for the faith you’ve shared with them. Send them to be men and women who will carry the flag of your family heritage wherever they go. Send them with the assurance that while the raising has ended and sending has begun you are always there to support, encourage and love them.
Go with God and may God go with you.
Beautiful, heartfelt, encouraging, tear-jerking. truthful, inspirational, and loving words.
As a parent of grown children, I know there were mistakes made, things left unsaid and undone, opportunities missed, words that left my mouth that shouldn’t have… but I did my best with what I knew at the time, and am SO thankful for other people in my girls’ lives that maybe filled in those gaps with love and faith.
I hang on to Philippians 1:6 and knowing that I am not big enough to mess up God’s plan… and seeing the love and faith in both of my girls… I suppose I didn’t do too bad of a parenting job!