A super powerful word in the life of the Christian and a word we all should know very well is where we’ll focus today.
Forgiveness.
To forgive doesn’t mean you have to say it’s ok. As a matter of fact, when you forgive someone, you’re saying it’s not ok but you’re willing to not hold it against the relationship. It means that you’re willing to move past the moment, hurt, wrong so that you can heal. Admittedly, forgiveness requires some form of acknowledgment of wrong. Without any form of acknowledgment, it’s hard to offer forgiveness. In church-world, we call that confession. Confessing or admitting the wrong we did is the first step in this process.
There’s a lesson we’ve taught our children about forgiveness that I believe is important for just about everyone. I’ve taught it to every church I’ve served. Forgiveness must flow freely. When someone apologizes or says they’re sorry, the thing you should work toward immediately is forgiveness. It’s good for the person who apologized but it’s also good for you.
When we forgive someone, we free ourselves of the burden of that pain. When we get to a place of forgiveness we are able to bring healing. But all too often forgiveness is withheld. Maybe it’s withheld accidentally because we don’t think it’s really all that important. Let me assure you, it is very important. When someone apologizes or admits a wrong, the one thing they need is forgiveness. Unfortunately, there are times when withholding forgiveness isn’t unintentional. Sometimes it’s done on purpose.
We hold forgiveness to make sure the other person is really sorry. Or maybe to teach them a lesson. We withhold forgiveness because they really hurt us and it just seems right to make them suffer. We refuse to offer those three simple words I forgive you because we’re still hurt. But forgiveness doesn’t mean we’re not hurt. It means we forgive them. It means we’re willing to work on the relationship, through the struggle, even in the painful moments.
Forgiveness is massively important. And to think anything less is likely a reason why forgiveness isn’t a free flowing concept in our lives today.
I’m sure glad Jesus didn’t handle forgiveness with me the same way we handle it with those around us. I’m sure glad he didn’t wait until I had the right heart or asked the right way, or you fill in the blank, before he offered me forgiveness. The beauty of who Jesus is and who he calls us to be is freely forgiven and forgiving people.
The Bible says that while we were still sinners Christ died for us. This is what makes forgiveness so amazing! It was ours long before we deserved it (not that we even deserve it now). It was earned for us before we asked for it. A plan was set in motion to forgive me and you before we even committed the wrong.
We read that when we come to God and ask for forgiveness, he grants it. Fully. Freely. Forever. Every single time. He removes those wrongs as far as the east is from the west as the Psalmist tells us. There are countless ways we see the Bible tell us about forgiveness, but all of them have the same message. We confess. He forgives. It’s the easiest formula out there.
So from whom do you need to hear those words? And perhaps a better question is who do you need to say them to?
Forgiveness is earned but not by you or me. It was earned by Jesus. And it’s his forgiveness that gives us a model for ours.