living for eternity today

Tag: ownership

Pie Slinging Problems

The tendency, when we face a problem, is to look outside of us for the problem and inside for the solution. We do it all the time actually. It’s the blame game. Something goes wrong and it’s generally someone, or something, else’s fault.

You get to work late, so it’s traffic’s fault. You oversleep. It surely has to be that your alarm didn’t even go off. You can’t stick to a diet. Well it must be that the other people in your house don’t diet the same way you do so you give in just to make them feel better.

This is not a healthy approach to problem solving and it stems from a significant internal issue. There is a better and healthier way to look at things. The problem generally is inside of us while the solution is outside of us.

When we identify the problem as being someone else’s fault, we tend to think we are our own right answer. Going to be late for work? Instead of getting up a little earlier, which often means going to bed a little earlier, we drive a little faster. When the problem is cast onto someone else then the solution is sought by deeper resolve or greater effort.

But what happens if we flip the script on this? What happens when we admit our fault in the problem? Instead of throwing the pie of blame at someone else, we belly up to the table and eat the pie we baked with our own actions.

I unfortunately see this in my life as a pastor as well. It actually happens more often than I’d like to admit. We feel a little dry in our spiritual life. We aren’t getting anything out of church. We feel like the music is meh at best. We don’t like that style or the way he dresses. We don’t like the preaching style or the way she confronted me about that issue (even though I know I’m wrong).

Whatever it is, we all too often react the same way. We cast blame on the other party and leave. We feel like the worship isn’t what we want, so we leave for greener pastures elsewhere. Or we walk away because they are obviously the problem.

The issue is that problem will follow us. The issue is we’re doing it for the wrong reason, with the wrong heart. Maybe it’s not the worship that’s dry? Maybe it’s that our heart isn’t in the right place! Maybe it’s not that we were offended by the way we were called out for something? Maybe it’s that we actually feel guilty. And instead of repenting of these things, it’s easier to just turn and walk away.

But walking away from our brokenness won’t fix it. Blaming someone else for something that really is our problem, won’t make the problem go away. It might delay its effects. It might elongate the time between the problem and the explosion in our lives. But it won’t make it go away.

Isaiah really drives this home in his letter in the Bible. Look some don’t like the Bible because it’s all churchy, whatever that really means. But the Bible is massively practical. Even if you’re not a religious person, I’m sure you can get something very practical out of the things found in the Bible.

Isaiah walks through the life of Israel. He talks about their problems and the many issues they’ve faced in life. Then around chapter 43-44 he starts to show how it’s not that God is the problem. It’s that their heart is the problem. They were offering sacrifices but didn’t really care about them. They were showing up for worship and getting nothing out of it. They were there but not really present.

They were going through the motions! And so do we at times.

Isaiah’s answer…repent and come back. If you’ve run from the problems in life, blaming everyone along the way, then it’s time to stop running. It’s time to turn around, repent/apologize and make amends. It’s time to claim your piece in the pie so you can healthily move on.

If you’re a pie slinger, then you’re really missing out. Some of this pie might be a little bitter, but I can promise you that if you take time to claim your piece of the pie your relationships will be stronger and your life will actually be more fulfilling.

Extreme Ownership

I’m kind of a sucker for a good book built around the leadership principles learned in the hard school of the US Military. This one is definitely a good book if you’re willing to apply some basic thoughts to the various aspects of your life and leadership journey. These ideas can be used in business, church, home, parenting, just about any area where you have to take ownership of yourself.

There are a ton of simple ideas that can be implemented. The authors Jocko Willink and Leif Babin use real stories of their time serving as US Navy Seals. They take the principles learned in hard fought times of conflict. Tell the story of that challenging time. Then show the straightforward principle they learned. But what makes this book so great is the way they then apply that same battle principle to the civilian sector with real stories of businesses that used these principles to enhance how they function.

I’m not going to give all of the ideas set forth in this book because then you won’t read it yourself. But here are a couple of things to consider.

Simplicity is key. The more simple we make the plan, the easier it will be for the people we lead to follow the plan. Have you ever had someone give you directions using far too many details that really are not pertinent to how you need to go to get to your destination? If so you have experienced the need for simplicity first hand. When we muddy the plan with all sorts of extra steps and details, we make it nearly impossible for those around us to get on board.

Discipline is freedom. That one sounds like an oxymoron but if you really think about it there’s some truth there. The more you disciplined you are about an area of your life, the more freedom you find in the rest of your day. If you have a pretty disciplined routine in life, you’ll find freedom the ability to be productive and get things done. The freedom that comes from discipline is found in the focus and hard work you put in. The more disciplined you are the higher chances of you finding breathing room and margin in life.

If you are in any leadership role at all, this is a book that will benefit you greatly if applied. I’ve been in many roles where the leaders around me would have done far more for the organization had they owned their leadership instead of ignored it. Don’t be that guy!

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