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Tag: lifestyle

An Automated Life

April 12, 2024 / / 0 Comments

One thing that is becoming really popular that I’m not sure I’m totally on board with yet is the whole automated lifestyle. I definitely get the convenience factor! But there are some things that are best left to a human. Like driving, especially on the open road! 

I was in Phoenix not too long ago for a conference. We stayed a little farther away from the conference venue putting us in the Tempe area. The hotel was nestled right in the midst of the hustle and bustle of college life.

While walking down the sidewalk on our way to dinner, we were passed by one of those Waymo cars. If you’re not familiar, it’s a self driving car. It’s covered in cameras just about everywhere. It’s honestly pretty ugly, but that’s not the point.

It’s a self driving car! The cameras keep it from running over pedestrians. The mapping system gets you where you need to go with accuracy. But there’s no one in the driver’s seat! That bothers me. Like a lot!

While I’m not a huge fan of automated cars driving through cities or down freeways, I do think there are some things that can be automated to make life a little easier. I like those learning thermostats and automatic lights that you can control through an app. Those are especially cool when someone is watching your house and you decide to have a little fun by blinking lights at them. Really not nice but very funny!

There is a great convenience in the automated world that can be super helpful! I use out of office responders when I’m going to be away from tech for a while. I use template emails to respond to mass email lists. There are some great benefits when using automation, which got me thinking…

Can I automate other parts of my life? The parts that are easy to miss or even skip!

It isn’t really the same as a self driving car or learning thermostat but the principle is similar. What actions can I predetermine to prevent me from dropping the ball later?

A quick example is something my parents taught me growing up. Actually many parents do this! Before going to bed at night, we had to set our clothes out for the next day. This prevented a couple of problems. We weren’t rushing around in the morning. We were guaranteed to have clothes that matched (more of a problem for boys than girls). And the clothes were sure to be school appropriate.

I still do this to this day. I set my clothes out the night before so I can just get up and go in the morning. When I wake up at 4am to get ready for the gym, I don’t want to have to fumble around getting clothes out or forget a change of clothes for work. So I pack a duffle with my clothes for the day and set out gym clothes. Makes life way easier!

You can do this for your meals as well. You can’t automate them unless you do one of those order by mail things, but you can predetermine and prepare ahead of time. If you’re doing a healthy eating kick, you can precook your meals and package them in containers in your fridge making it a simple grab and go in the morning when you leave. I have friends that do freezer meal prep stuff where 3 or 4 of them get together and make a bunch of casseroles and then separate it out into containers to be put in the freezer. Bam automated healthy eating.

The point here is to find what areas in your life you can automate or predetermine. The more of your life you can predetermine, the less likely you’ll be to react in a moment where clarity is lacking. I guess a semi-automated life isn’t all that bad after all!

Respond Don’t React

September 27, 2023 / / 0 Comments

There’s a little known secret about me that is soon to not be so little known. I can’t stand it when someone slaps my back. Partially because it’s not the nicest feeling thing in the world and second because it triggers a reaction in my brain that isn’t healthy. You see when someone slaps my back (even as a nice gesture if that’s even possible) it makes my defense mechanisms of fight go into high alert.

It’s like a multi alarm fire going off in my brain. Someone slaps my back and then my body tenses up and all of the endorphins start moving around. My blood pressure rises. My face gets a little red and my muscles tighten up. Inherently my hands clench into fists and I have to put all of my energy into NOT letting my arms come out swinging.

I know it’s an overreaction. I know it’s not good, healthy, or even warranted. But it’s the reality. So please after reading this don’t be the person that tries it out. Just don’t be that person. Please.

I tell this little story because I want you to see how bad reactions can be. Sure some reactions can be good – lay my hand on a hot surface and my reaction is to remove it quickly. Not all reactions are bad but some are very bad and very destructive. Those are the reactions to which I’m referring in this post.

Do you know your back slap kind of reaction triggers? Maybe it’s a word someone says or a type of comment? Something the just triggers a massive fight or flight reaction from you.

The difference between a reaction and a response is time. That’s really all it is. A little bit of time separating their initial action and your way of answering back. If you answer quickly, chances are you’re on the fast track to a reaction. But if you allow the action to simmer for even a second or two, you are more likely to come back with a response that isn’t so harsh and punching someone because they slap your back.

I’ve had this happen in my life far too many times. Someone says something and my gut reaction is to talk. I react. And it rarely is helpful, beneficial or godly. And often a reaction will cause hurt, brokenness, and division in ways we could never predict.

In the heat of the moment it’s just not the right time to find your comeback. Think about it for a minute. Have a good thought out approach that is more likely to win the day than lashing out with your gut reaction.

I know some of you are probably saying hypocrite much. Look I already told you I’m not perfect at this thing. Just because I know the right way to handle things doesn’t mean that I do it right all the time (or even most of the time).

It’s really simple but simple doesn’t mean easy. Simple in that there are two really critical steps but hard because we’ve gotten so used to reacting that stopping to think isn’t our first choice.

The two simple steps are to know your triggers and create a better response. I know way too simple but it’s just that simple. Do you know your backslap moments? If so, what are some ways you can flip the script your brain tells you and instead of tensing up and wanting to pummel someone take a different approach?

Reactions are good in some scenarios. But know when a reaction is warranted and when a response is more appropriate. And don’t slap my back. It won’t end well for either of us.

Power of Habits

September 26, 2023 / / 0 Comments

I’ve been back on a kick of listening to podcasts and books on my drives to the gym and work. One of the concepts that came out of my drive time listening this past week was about the power of habits. This isn’t like some power of positive thinking or self help kind of deal. But the consistency of doing small things well as part of a regular regimen. Really the goal is to build momentum.

Momentum is a powerful asset in life but you can’t have momentum without the small steps getting started.

All too often we tend to look at a lofty goal and want to achieve it. We tend to think as long as there’s a goal, we should be able to just push hard enough and get it done. But that’s not really the way things work.

Think of a big goal or vision statement as a ladder. The end result is the top rung of the ladder. We’d never grab a 30 foot ladder and just jump to the top step. It doesn’t work that way. We need to find the lower rungs to help us get started. Each rung on the ladder is another step toward the top. Each one helps us build momentum to get closer to that final goal of reaching the top.

The same is true for some of the goals we make in our daily lives. Often it’s not about the top rung of the ladder. The greatest differences can often be made on the short, seemingly small steps taken one after another to get there.

Ok so here’s a real life example. Many people have a goal to lose a few pounds after the first of the year. We’ve packed on some holiday blubber and want to lose a bit of it so our pants fit better. We buy a gym membership and new gym clothes. We pick up a new water bottle because this is the year we’re going to drink a gallon of water a day. We get all the right things and set the goal of dropping 25 pounds. But how often does it actually happen?

The problem is we miss the small rungs on the ladder. Sure getting the workout gear and the gym membership are helpful but we haven’t created a habit yet. We haven’t set the daily steps we’re going to take to get there. What if we set alarms on our phone to tell us when to get up and walk throughout the day? What about getting one of those apps that reminds us to drink a glass of water now please? Those are steps in the right direction as well.

But a habit isn’t about ideals or intentions. Habits are about actions. Consistent actions taken over time. This is what a habit is all about. This means that when the alarm goes off earlier than you like to wake up, you still get up. You find someone to hold you accountable to being at the gym. Because we all know letting someone down is harder than just not showing up yourself. Every day we take these small steps to create a habit that one day will do more than help you lose 25 pounds. It becomes a lifestyle where those 25 pounds come off and muscle is formed in their place.

The same can be said for most anything. It’s about the small steps we need to take regularly to get us to the intended destination. Habits are powerful but a word of caution. They can easily be derailed if we don’t keep ourselves accountable. As hard as it is to establish a habit, unfortunately it’s super easy to fall out of it. This is where we have to be intentional about each and every step along the path to that top rung of the ladder.

To sum it all up, habits help but habits are more than thoughts. They’re actions done repeatedly over time. They eventually become part of who we are. What habit do you need to start today to get you where you’re going?

What’s Your Why?

March 2, 2023 / / 0 Comments

If you’re a parent, or you remember your childhood at all, you likely have a love-hate relationship with the word why. While this is a question I have asked more times that I can even count, it’s a question that I couldn’t stand receiving from my children.

So to be totally honest, I don’t have a problem with the word why, it’s generally the tone in which it is spoken that’s of great disturbance to me. The word is normally said through a sigh or a whining voice. It normally comes with the word but preceding it. This is the kind of why that I really can’t stand!

There is another why that I believe is really important. Many years ago a friend told me the importance of knowing your reason why. He said – if your reason why isn’t strong enough, you’ll always find a reason why not. So very simple of a thought but it explains so much that’s wrong in our world and culture right now.

This is why our New Year’s resolutions don’t typically last. Our why is too weak. I’ve seen this far too often. She wants to lose some weight to fit into her wedding dress. It works for a time but she quickly loses steam. Her why was too short sighted. He wants to stash away a few extra dollars for a rainy day but can’t seem to get any traction. His why was far too broad.

You see the why must be greater than any excuse or why not we can come up with or we’ll lose. This is why our attempts at the new year body don’t generally make it beyond February. We don’t have a good long range picture or reason to keep driving us forward.

What’s your why?

Ok so here’s a warning. I’m going to get a little “churchy” on you for a second. Don’t tune out just yet though. This is a bible example to help drive our point home.

There’s a passage in the latter portion of the Bible that is generally answered wrong. It is in one of Peter’s letters and he says always be prepared to give an answer to anyone who asks you for the reason for the hope that is in you.

Did you get it? What’s your why?

We generally read that verse and say our hope is in Jesus. And while this is correct, it’s answering a question that wasn’t asked. He didn’t say where is your hope. He said why is your hope there. This is a big difference.

Knowing your reason why is really important. Have you ever seen someone go through a really bad time in life and waffle in their faith? I don’t mean they were late for work or overslept kind of bad time. I mean lost their spouse or their house burned down in a freak accident kind of bad day. In these types of situations our why is tested tremendously.

What’s your why?

So often when we go through these really challenging moments in life, we default to asking things like where is God or how could he let this happen to me. We then wonder if it’s all worth it. I’ve been there. I know how this goes.

But what’s your why keeps you from falling off the deep end when trouble and struggle and hardship arise. When we know the reason for the hope that we have, we’ll be able to see that there’s a bigger picture at play here. We’ll be able to get through some of the hardship and struggle and pain because we know something that we can’t see is just around the corner.

Ok back to that summer swimsuit body or wedding ready figure. If this is as far as you can see, then when the wedding is over or summer is past you’re likely going to fall off the wagon. But if you have a big enough reason why to drive you, then even when the event is over you’ll still have a habit and lifestyle that will continue.

I’ve been asked why I get up at 4:30 in the morning to go to the gym. I used to do it to be able to lift a certain amount of weight. But then I met that goal and it was tempting to let things slide. Now the reason is much bigger than bench pressing 350lbs or running a certain distance in a set timeframe. It’s about overall health, wellness, mental clarity, stress management, being around to see my kids get married, meet my grandkids, manage my property, take care of my family. These are reasons why that will far outlast my ability to lift certain amounts of weight or run a set speed.

What is your why? When you can answer this with a big enough and strong enough reason, then you’ll be able to stop every excuse from flooding into your mind.

Know the reason why and soon you’ll have a lifestyle that matches the desire of your heart today.

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