Every situation in life comes with a choice of how we’re going to approach it. Are we going to try to find a problem in every situation, or are we going to be part of a solution? I read an article recently where the author said it has to be exhausting to always be looking for a problem in the world. Pray for those people. I never really thought of that before, but it’s so very true! And it reminds me of something I learned as a child and that we teach regularly.
If all we do is search for something wrong, I can guarantee you’ll be able to find it. But I can also guarantee that you’ll be a much less joyful person in the process. It seems that we live in a world where people are riddled with this desire to find a problem. We listen to the news to pick apart the facts that are presented. We scroll through our social media feeds to find something written that doesn’t line up with what we think, believe, or how we live. We look at people and judge their actions or clothing or speaking just to find something wrong with them.
Does it make us feel better? Do we do this in an effort to build ourselves up by using the pieces of someone else’s life that we smashed?
If you have to smash someone else’s life in an effort to make yourself look or feel better, then you my friend not only have a problem but frankly are a problem. There’s a principle that we teach in the church that’s based on one of the commands of God in the Old Testament. Put the best construction on everything.
Do you do that? Do you read someone’s social, listen to them speaking, watch them walking, evaluate their clothing situation and put the best construction on them? Or do we jump to conclusions and judge based on what our preconceived opinion sees and hears?
Look, I get it. Not everyone is like you. And you aren’t going to agree with everyone. But there are some things that you can just let go. You don’t have to be the social media troll that pipes up on everything you don’t agree with just to raise trouble.
Now as in everything in life, there are exceptions to this just keep quiet rule. There are times when it is very beneficial and even necessary to say something. If someone is living a life that is dangerous, incongruent with their expressed belief, or just out of the norm for them. These can be indicators that something is drastically wrong. But make sure to check your heart and your motives before you say something. Carefully evaluate your intentions. Are you doing this for you or for them? Is your intent to gain understanding of what’s going on in their life or to infuse their life with your opinion?
If we truly pause long enough to evaluate our intentions, then it’s very likely most of the things we were going to say are not necessary or even beneficial. So it’s really all about perspective. Are you looking at something from your vantage point and trying to make someone else see your side of things? Or are you selflessly entering a conversation with no agenda other than to humbly learn someone else’s point of view? When you figure this out, you’ll soon see what it means to put the best construction on everything.