Do you remember that childish thing we did? You know when someone did something wrong, how we’d all make sounds of shock while pointing our finger at the wrong doer? We’d make sure the proper person in authority would know that she did it or he’s the guilty one. How annoying was that! I’m sure glad we stopped doing that. Or did we?

As annoying as that is and as almost embarrassing at it is to think about now, I’m starting to see a resurgence of this very way of handling problems. We might not point fingers and bemoan the situation with groans and other unintelligent sounds. But we do tend to throw some blame around.

There’s a tendency in our lives to publicly shame someone or belittle them when we don’t like how they’ve handled a situation. And honestly it makes us no better than those annoying turds we were growing up. It’s immature and quite frankly is counterproductive.

Have we become so focused on what others are doing wrong that we’ve forgotten what we’re called to do?

Let’s get this straight. This doesn’t mean we don’t call wrong – wrong! Actually just the opposite. It means that we call it wrong in the moment. NOT in friend groups or behind someone’s back. We don’t belittle someone who didn’t act or react how we would have liked. And for crying out loud, settling a dispute on social media just doesn’t work. So don’t even try that one.

There’s wisdom in the idea of getting our own house in order instead of tearing someone else’s house down. We’ve become a culture rich on tearing people down. Or at best just deleting them from our lives altogether. From blocking phone numbers to unfriending someone on social media, we can all but erase someone from existence with the click of a button. And it’s just like that childish game of tattle tale. Pointing our fingers at someone and trying to show the world how awful he is or how terrible of a person she is.

How about we try something new? Mind your own business. I mean seriously. How about instead of trying to undermine someone else and make their lives a living hell, we take a minute to focus on how we need a little grace shown to us? Let’s try to see what areas of life we’re not living 100% perfectly. Sure have your one on one conversations. Tell someone the honest truth, even if it hurts. Even if it means running the risk of losing something or someone special. But don’t get your panties in a bunch playing the finger pointing game.

The presence of social media and text messaging has raised a great crop of keyboard warriors who can sit with you face to face and seemingly have nothing bad to say. Then the moment they find their security behind a keyboard they can blast you to kingdom come. Or spread weird rumors about you that couldn’t be any less true.

If we were to realize who we are as individuals and what we’re called to do, then perhaps the shortcomings of others wouldn’t really be as bothersome. Maybe if we were as dedicated to our role in society as we are to someone else’s downfall in it, we could look beyond a slip of the tongue or meet a wrong doing with grace. The very same grace we ourselves expect when we mess up.

So in short perhaps we should get our own stuff together before we try dragging someone else’s name through the mud.