Perhaps this letter comes far too late. The things I wish I would have told you while you still stood among us. But maybe the words found here will bring comfort to someone. Maybe they bring closure. Maybe they let people know who you really were.

Brother, I’m sorry I wasn’t there. When you were at your hardest moments, you felt like the world was empty. You talked of loneliness and darkness and felt like life had a major void, but you knew in your heart you weren’t alone. You craved the connection that you had lost. The love of your life was so far out of reach and you didn’t know how to cope. You cried and crumbled and called out for help, and no matter who was there or how close we stood to you – you still felt alone.

You carried a weight under which many of us would have broken a long time ago. You were husband and spiritual leader in your home. You were a 24/7 nurse who lovingly stood by your bride and prayed with her for years as she battled cancer. You took your responsibility seriously. You had little close family of your own so her family became like yours. You were guarded because you didn’t think anyone could really love someone like you. But what’s not to love brother. You were something special.

I’ll miss our weekly calls and more than weekly texts. I’ll miss the way you gently reminded me that I forgot to change colors on the church furnishings. I’ll miss our brotherly banter over politics, denominations, religion, relationships, how much cancer sucks, and what it means to be a man of God. But most importantly I’ll miss you my friend.

You taught me more than you probably will ever know. From how to love people deeply to what it means to really have hope in Jesus when there’s nothing else left. Thank you for the lessons my friend, I only wish there were a few more to come. I’m a slow learner you know.

But brother there’s one thing I think you might have forgotten so I want to put it here. It’s too late for you to hear it but maybe it will make a difference for someone else.

No matter how lonely you feel, you are never alone. No matter how dark the nights, a little light is glimmering in the corner. Even in those final moments, the moments that were the hardest, the moments when there was little time left – even in those moments that would change our lives someone was changing yours.

You fought like no one I knew. You fought for what you knew was the truth of scripture. You fought for your bride and for your church. You even fought for me a time or two. I only wish I would have been able to fight harder for you. But as I sit and write this final note I’m reminded that someone far more capable than me already did that fighting and won.

To the friends and family you left behind I pray they always know that what you saw and what you knew can change their lives too. I hope they look beyond the pain and despair, the slow fade and the abrupt end to see where your hope was. There’s one thing we all need to know about Joe. He had two loves: his bride and his Jesus and today we rest in the hope that he sits with them both. And he’d love nothing more than to see you there one day too!

Until we meet again brother. Rest well in the arms of Jesus.

Soli Deo Gloria – To God Alone Be Glory