A catalyst is one that sparks something. The catalyst speaks from experience and enables others to move forward more freely. These articles are written to act as a catalyst in your life.
It’s been a while since I’ve been in a crowded place. No not because of covid but because I really don’t do crowds that much to be honest. But I remember the last time I was at Disney with my family, the ride attendant wanted everyone to move forward and fill all available space. Those words made me cringe. I don’t want to fill all available space. I didn’t want the sweaty man behind me pressing in closer to me. I didn’t want to lose any opportunity for air to flow through the hot line as we awaited entry on the ride.
We need to leave some room to breathe.
Maybe you’re not a ride person or have never been to a busy park like that. But what about reading. Have you ever read a book that had such tiny print and the margins were so small that there was literally no extra room on the page? Or how about when you take notes in class, were you the kind of person who filled the page in every possible direction and filled all available space?
We need to leave margin.
This is a really important principle that we need to really take to heart. Margin is critical. When we pack too many people into a small space and leave no extra room (aka margin), we can feel claustrophobic and have a hard time breathing. It can even cause a panic attack in some people.
The same is true in our schedules. If we don’t leave some margin in our lives, we end up pushing too close to the edges of our ability and have no room for emergencies or small changes in our schedules.
I find in my life, there are seasons when I run from place to place and fill my nights with meetings and games for the kids and projects around the house. When these things happen I have so little margin that I tend to miss some key moments in life. Or I miss just simple opportunities that pop up unannounced.
For a season I worked two full time jobs. I was gone all the time. From sun up to sun down and then after all went to bed I was on the go preparing for the next thing. I missed parties and outings and even some holidays. I had no margin. My neighbors and friends and family didn’t know who I was because I was never around. I missed being able to have a beverage with my neighbors around their fire pit. I wasn’t there to help a friend through a challenging time. I even missed some key moments in my children’s lives.
Living with no margin means we miss out on far too much important, spontaneous stuff in life. I’d like to challenge you to evaluate your schedule and be honest. What needs to go? What needs to stay? Who can do some of the things on your calendar that you really don’t need to do? What are the things that only you can do? And what are the things that someone else is just as qualified and just as capable of doing?
See if you can create some margin in your life. You’ll be glad you did.
I remember a little over four years ago there was a whole movement in the United States with people who were upset about the results of the 2016 election that started a not my president social media campaign. It was laughable to say the least. They weren’t going to change an election with a social media campaign. Not sure what they were trying to prove to be honest. But it was indicative of a deeper rooted issue that was present in our culture. In 2021 it’s been given the name cancel culture.
The basic principle of cancel culture is that when something doesn’t go how we want it to go, we cancel it. Now canceling comes in a variety of forms. We delete someone from social media and act as if they never existed. We change the narrative of someone’s story to line up with what fits our lives best. We demonize the opposing person to make them the total enemy just because they have a different view point.
There are tons of ways that this is done in our world today. And it goes both ways, so let’s not get our panties all in a wad here. This is a two sided game that’s played out in life, so stop pointing fingers at the “other side” for doing this all the time. Although it always looks worse from our perspective when the opposition does it.
But is there a better way? Is there a better way to handle it when someone disagrees with us or opposes our view point?
Yes! There is! It’s called being an adult. Goodness we act like a bunch of preschoolers who get our feelings hurt. Grow up!
Ok that wasn’t helpful at all. Sorry about that. Seriously, there is a better way to handle this for sure. Canceling is not the right answer. Ever. Here are a few steps that we can take to prevent ourselves from canceling someone that has a different outlook than we have.
Listen before replying.
One of the biggest issues that I find exists in this whole cancel culture world is that we make assumptions based on emotion not fact. We hear the part of what someone says and form our opinion before we know the whole story. All too often our communication is predominately in short written forms like text messages or social media. Well you can’t get all of your thoughts out in a text message and you have no idea what a person really is thinking when you read that text. So instead of asking what a person means, we tend to jump to our emotional response. We make assumptions. ASSumptions are not good by the way. They make you look, well let’s just say bad.
Respond don’t react.
Following closely on the heals of listening is having a measured response. It’s super easy to give the gut reaction to something but let’s be honest. That’s usually not the best way of doing things is it?
I think of wha happens when someone, even jokingly, slaps me in the back. Not to be hurtful or anything just a hit on the back harder than a gentle pat. Well, something inside me flips when that happens. My reaction is generally not that great. I will typically spin around with fist clenched ready to show you in no uncertain terms that I don’t like that. I know it’s an overreaction but that’s what reactions are – they are not well thought out.
So when we respond instead of react, we take time to process the information that someone gives us. We listen to the words but also read the nonverbal cues. When we’ve put all of the information together and calmed ourselves down from any emotional vigor, we can respond in a more level-headed way.
Remove Emotion.
Another key to having a civil conversation with someone who differs from you is to remove your emotionally keyed up self from the equation. We all too often come into a situation with all sorts of preconceived ideas, emotions from other parts of life, bad day at work, scared of financial trouble, kids aren’t listening, friends don’t treat us the same way, all sorts of things that pile up and then someone disagrees and WHACK! We rapidly turn around and pummel the person who thinks red is a better color than blue.
When we’re in a situation where we disagree with someone else, it can be helpful to step away for a predetermined amount of time to cool off. Say something like Hey I’m not in a good place right now, so I’m going to go for 10 minutes to cool off and then we can talk more. But come back in 10 minutes and be cooled off!
The two problems we have with this most often are that we don’t take time to cool off when we know it’s the right thing to do. And secondly, we don’t set a return time. If we don’t set a return time, it comes across like we’re ditching the conversation. Saying that you need to go cool off is so ambiguous and has the appearance that you’re never coming back and just avoiding the problem.
So step away and cool off. Then come back and with a level head talk gently about it.
Lower your voice.
One of my favorite things about parenting that I learned way too late was the power of a whisper. When we’re heated up and someone isn’t listening to us and we feel attacked or like we need to get a point across, we tend to raise our voice and yell. But when we raise our voice, the other person backs away.
If we want to get the situation to calm down and draw them close, we need to lower our voice (and in turn lower our blood pressure). Then we will force ourselves to more calmly engage in conversation.
It’s ok to not see things the same way.
The last part of this is to realize that we don’t need to agree with everyone. It’s ok to disagree. Disagreement doesn’t mean war. It just means that I can respect your point of view but I expect you to do the same for mine.
None of these alone are silver bullet approaches to diffusing conflict. But all of them put together will go a long way toward deescalating some of the trivial back biting we find prevalent in our society and relationships these days.
Ok so let me just throw this out there. I am 100% totally and completely over what covid has done to the lives of so many people. We’ve all been impacted by either the virus or the way it was handled. Some have tragically lost their lives due to complications of the illness. Others were slowed down for a time because they got it. Still others lost jobs, homes, loved ones, livelihoods, and the ability to just function in normal life.
I’ve heard so many times I want things to go back to normal. But do we really? I mean do we really want life to just magically snap back into place like a rubber band after being stretched. If we really just one day snap back to life as it was in 2019, what was the purpose of all of the struggle of 2020? If we just go back to the glory days of the past, then we essentially wasted what looks to be close to two years of our lives. No one wants to waste their life away!
So I want to encourage you to see this portion of life not simply as an interruption to your normal routine but as a disruption to the flow of how things were. An interruption is temporary and allows things to return to how they were previously. It’s like a blip on a radar then it’s gone. A disruption is a roadblock that forces us to take a different path. Sometimes a disruption can be negative but other times it can breathe new life into a situation.
Are there things about this whole new way of living that aren’t convenient or even good for that matter? Absolutely! Masks and distance are not how God created us. We were created to live in community. So much of communication is nonverbal and masks completely mess that up! I’ve had to repeat myself more times than I care to admit because someone can’t hear my clearly through a mask. Distance is not healthy either. Isolation easily leads to depression and can be deadly. The suicide rates are skyrocketing not just in our country but around the world.
I guess when we look at this way of living as an interruption we just want to get it over and go back to our comfort zone. But that’s just a tad selfish if you ask me. If our lives are more about what make us comfortable than what makes life better for others, then we have our priorities all screwed up.
But if we look at the past year or so as a disruption, we’re allowed to look back and learn form the past so that we can be more intentional moving forward. Intentional. That’s a power word. The focus of intentionality is that we live our lives with an intended purpose. Going back to the way things were means our purpose was already fulfilled, but that’s just not true. Living for the past gets us nowhere and it’s exhausting.
Do you find yourself more anxious, upset, tired or irritable than normal? Chances are you’re longing for the past. You’re trying to run down the up escalator. It’s exhausting to try to fight every day for something over which you have no control. Don’t give up. But change perspective. Be intentional about your day. Look at the person you are called to be. Chances are the disruptions of the past 12 months have very little impact on the person God created you to be. It’s time to pivot and make the necessary adjustments to serve those around you best.
In his book Good to Great, Jim Collins says that the greatest enemy of great is good. We settle for good all the time. Good isn’t bad. It’s good afterall. But is there something better than good waiting right around the corner? Is the good thing of yesterday that we want back, keeping us from the great thing we can experience tomorrow?
I’ve done a lot of thinking about this lately. As a pastor I look at what this disruption has brought about. I’ve met so many new people through this time that I never would have met had we not been in this mess. I’ve connected with new faces at church. I’ve had conversations with people at the gym that I’ve never talked to before. We’ve expanded our reach albeit virtually to many more than we ever would have. The way we were doing things before was good. I do miss seeing some of the people around church that we haven’t seen in months. And one day I hope they’re back again!
But I also see the countless opportunities that God has given me by making me slow down and spend more intentional time with family. Reorganize my calendar to better reflect my priorities. Value the expressions on people’s faces that I often took for granted. There are so many great things that I have learned through this pandemic by just changing perspective.
So while I want some things to change, I don’t want them to go back to normal because normal isn’t the life we’re supposed to life!
When I was child I had a telescope. I put it in my window and looked up at the stars. I positioned the tripod on my tall dresser and pointed the one end out the window and up at the sky. I positioned my eye close to the smaller end and looked up at the stars. I was amazed at how close things were! When used properly a telescope is a truly amazing tool!
But one day for grins and giggles I turned it around and looked at the stars backwards. I rotated the telescope 360 degrees and looked again. The stars were unrecognizable. They were smaller than without a telescope. When used properly the telescope can really help us gain a healthy perspective on space but when turned around it’s pretty much pointless.
The same is true for how we view events in life. It’s easy to use the events in our lives as turn around points and reflect on how things used to be. But that’s no more healthy than using a telescope backwards. Here’s an example…
The year 2020 probably caught you off guard a bit. Going into the year we were all doing the corny Perfect Vision in 2020 or seeing clearly in 2020, but then February and March hit. To say that March came in like a lion would be an understatement! All of our plans for Easter and summer were pretty much trash by the end of March.
Many people in my circle took time to throw pity parties of how things used to be, myself included. We looked at Easter plans and VBS plans and all the thought and effort that went into preplanning much of our calendar year. So it was healthy to reflect for a second. Pausing to regain focus is never a bad thing. For us that lasted for about 3-4 weeks. We temporarily canceled all of our plans for the foreseeable future. No egg hunt, no vacation bible school, no in person worship, no gatherings, no family get togethers, no vacations and the list went on and on.
After we pumped the breaks on all of our plans and took a few weeks to catch our breath, we came to the conclusion that we might be doing this whole thing all wrong. We were looking at the way things were currently and complaining about the inconvenience of it all. We were dreaming about the good old days of four weeks ago. We were using the telescope to look backward.
We weren’t looking forward to life as we now know it. We couldn’t get past the inconvenience of the new hurdles. We longed for better days, but for so many better days looked a lot like the good ole days of the past. But that’s just not productive.
Now don’t get me wrong. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with remembering and celebrating the events of the past. There’s nothing wrong with learning from mistakes and changing our approach to life. But we can’t keep looking over our shoulder at how life used to be. You don’t drive that way. You don’t walk that way. You don’t look through a telescope that way. You can’t do life that way either.
So we quickly and without much notice, took a hard and abrupt turn. We planted our foot firm on what we knew was non-negotiable in our area of life. We know family was important and community was critical. We knew that there had to be a way to use this moment in life to establish a new set of rhythms. While we didn’t know exactly what the future held, and for that matter still don’t have a clue, we knew we had to stop looking backward and start looking forward.
As you go through life changing and traumatic moments, take time to pause for healing. But don’t stay paused for too long. Use the trauma, the set back, the interruption as a means to help you reevaluate what’s in front of you. Don’t look through the lens of the best days are behind us or getting back to how we used to do it. Use the disruption to truly change course and set a new path to get you to an even better promised future.
Those of us with control issues really have a hard time with this one but let’s be honest sometimes we waste time doing what someone else is equally, if not more qualified to do. I heard this line a while ago at a conference and it has just stuck with me. I think it was from Andy Stanley, but can’t be totally certain. All I know is it’s not my original thought, because I’m not quite this witty or intelligent.
Only do what only you can do.
The phrase at face value seems a little bit obvious. But when we really think about it, how much time do we spend doing what other people are way more suited to do? What’s worse is when we do the things that others are capable of doing, we often short change those people to whom we’re called to serve. Enough of the abstract here’s a quick example.
I’m a husband and a dad. And to be totally honest, I’m not all that great at either some days. And if I were to honestly evaluate the moments when I’m less effective at either of these roles, I’d find that I am doing things that are not my primary role. That means sometimes I let my job come before my primary role as a dad or husband. Sometimes I let my passions come in the way of the things that are most important. Only I can be the husband to my wife and the dad to my kids. Only I can do these things right now and if I don’t then they are neglected.
So what are you doing that you’re not really the most gifted at doing? When we free ourselves from the things we can do to do the things we’re really supposed to do, we allow for greater success in those areas.
Another principle that dovetails nicely here comes from the book Good to Great. The line goes something like good is the enemy of great. We have to be careful not to hear that these things we’re doing are bad because they’re not bad at all. Actually on the contrary, many, if not most, of these extra things are good and very much worthwhile. But when we only do the good things, we prevent ourselves from doing the great things.
So the long and short is this. Do what you can do. The good and the great things that God established for you to do. Empower others to do the rest. Give away things that will help others feel that sense of accomplishment. When we delegate not only the task but also the authority for an area of our work, we multiply our effectiveness.
I have been doing a bit more reading lately and it’s been really good stuff, and one of the ways that I process information is by writing down what I read and applying it to real life. Recently I came across the idea that we are most easily tempted to do wrong in one of three ways: approval, appetite and ambition. It’s absolutely uncanny that these three categories actually encompass so much of what drives us in life. Interestingly enough the three areas that we struggle with the most in life are the three ways Satan tried to get Jesus to fall as well.
Appetite
Food is an essential part of life to be sure. We all need food to survive. But often our fear of not having the right stuff or enough stuff can drive us to do weird things! And appetite isn’t just about food. It’s about our need and desire for more. Appetite is about gathering for ourselves in a way that makes the created stuff more important than the creator. Need an example? You don’t have to go far.
I mean seriously if you’re being honest you have to admit the toilet paper shortage of 2020 was a bit ridiculous to put it very mildly. People in the world were scared that when the pandemic, an upper respiratory virus, hit in early 2020 they needed to control as much as they could. Store shelves were ransacked. Banks were filled with people drawing out money at alarming rates. Guns and ammo were impossible to find. And toilet paper was gone! The appetite of the American people became so consumed with a self-serving attitude that we gathered when we should have shared.
Turn these stones into bread was the temptation Satan gave to Jesus. You’re hungry do something about it. Fill that appetite with what pleases you and makes you feel better. Instead of falling for the idol of appetite, Jesus relied on the provision of his Father. We would be well served if we focused on what we have instead of what we want. Then our appetite god is less likely to get away from us.
Approval
It’s great to be recognized isn’t it? I mean you put in a lot of work on a project. You do a good job. You succeed in what your boss wanted from you. A little ‘atta boy’ or pat on the back wouldn’t hurt anything would it? I don’t mean getting your name in lights and having the world shout your name from the mountains but a thank you isn’t too bad a thing is it?
The god of approval can be a dangerous and slippery slope. While there isn’t a real problem with a thank you now and again the issue of approval turns sour when we seek the approval of everyone around us thereby seizing our actions out of fear that we won’t gain that approval. Taken to another level we’re supposed to seek the approval of God rather than men.
When Satan was tempting Jesus, he tried to get him to get teh approval of the crowds. Go and throw yourself off this peak and let them all see how great and powerful you are. Jesus didn’t take the bait. He didn’t fall for it. Instead he rested in the approval he received from his Father. This approval is the one we need to seek as well. The approval of those around us will vary based on their emotional status and how they feel in the moment. But God is consistent and his approval of us isn’t tied to what we do but what Jesus already did for us.
Ambition
The final area of temptation to which we often fall is ambition which when taken too far is pride. This area of ambition being a problem is when we try to climb the ladder of success at the expense of all those around us. Or when our ambition is all about making a name for ourselves. This is when things get bad.
Jesus faced this same thing too. When he was with Satan in the wilderness, the carrot of self aggrandizement was waved before Jesus. Satan tried to offer to Jesus all the power he could imagine. If you please me then you get all this. Jesus wanted nothing of it. He knew that his ambition wasn’t in himself but in the promise and provision of his Father.
So there you have it. All of them are good in moderation but good taken too far is evil. Curb your appetite. Seek approval from God alone. And remember that your ambition should be for service not gratification.
I’ve recently had the chance to dive back into a little continued learning with a group of colleagues and it’s been super refreshing. I’m not a school classroom kind of guy so the style of this learning is really effective for me. While I’d much rather the interactions be in person we all have to make the most of these moments no matter how they come.
In a recent session with this group we discussed in general terms a variety of learning styles and growth strategies. While this may be scary for some and boring for others, to me it was wonderfully applicable. The three approaches are information, imitation and innovation. This goes along with the whole nursing adage of see one, do one, teach one. It’s really nothing new but I feel we’ve gotten away from it a bit in our technologically comfortable world.
Information
The concept we called information is very much a classroom lecture type of approach. Our schools by and large use this approach to teaching. We spit out information and the students are responsible for soaking it up. This is also how lectures, business programs, and even many churches approach their task. They have set information and they see their role as merely data dumping, puking up facts, pushing papers, communicating truths.
But if we only dump facts we’re left with a take it or leave it situation. And given our post modern views of all truth being relative that information you just spent time dumping on the learner, they can determine for themselves if they want to listen to it or if it’s just junk to them. Information is critical but it’s one part of a three phase approach.
Imitation
Another element of the teaching/learning model is that of imitation. Do we give our learners the time and space to put their learning into practice with specific guidelines and even some direction and personal guidance. It’s said that imitation is the greatest form of flattery. So are we giving the learners in our setting something worth imitating? Or are we just throwing facts at them like pasta at a wall and seeing what sticks?
Imitation is how many trade professions learn their task. They get the head knowledge from classes and books then they’re paired up with a mentor who they are to shadow. This mentor will guide them and direct them on how to do the job properly. Little by little you take on new tasks that apply the information you learned in real life scenarios and situations.
Innovation
The third portion here is innovation. This is giving someone the ability and the space and permission and even encouragement to start something new and then taking your hands off. The last part of that is the hard part. Giving something over to someone else isn’t easy because they aren’t going to do it your way. Then taking your hands off and walking away to let them make it their own is really challenging.
In my world as a pastor the past year has been about innovation of approach while keeping the information constant and trying to find space for imitation to still happen when we can’t even be in the same room at times. When we find our identity tied to one of these approaches we’ll quickly grow weary and eventually hit the wall of depression and exhaustion when our approach doesn’t seem to be working like it used to work.
Some practical questions:
Which of these three is most comfortable for you?
Which is the most difficult?
Which of these, if implemented, could bring the greatest impact on your life, family, organization?
How does your approach need to change to better serve the people
I’m currently cramming through a book to join a group that’s been together for a few months already and need to get caught up. And this dichotomy shows up in the first couple of chapters. It’s the dichotomy of invitation and challenge. Now that doesn’t mean a lot at face value but if you give me about 4 mins of your time and read this there’s stuff here that can apply to just about everyone’s life.
So the idea of invitation and challenge was brought up in the context of breaking a horse. I’m really not a big fan of here terminology of breaking something but I hope you know what that means. Simply put, it’s making a wild horse a little less wild. Some would do this by beating the horse and breaking their spirit. Some would do this by attempting to ride them in a body of water making it harder for the horse to kick and buck the off. But the book uses a different analogy and that’s how a horse is welcomed into a herd in the wild.
It’s something that the author calls invitation and challenge. The idea behind invitation and challenge is pretty simple, and it is super helpful in how we raise up leaders and even teach our children how to grow and mature. In what follows I will unpack the two sides of invitation and challenge and apply them to basic relationship and leadership settings.
There is a back and forth that needs to happen in every relationship. It is all about welcoming and getting to know the other person on their terms. And then offering up a challenge of sorts to show there are expectation and who ultimately has authority.
Invitation is welcoming someone in and drawing them close. In the illustration of the horses used above, the outsider horse is greeted by a female horse from the herd. The mare would turn sideways and in a show of vulnerability would bare her side. This is the weakest part of the horse if you didn’t know. By turning she was indicating that she came with no ill intention and is willing to let the outsider horse come closer. As the outsider draws in a little, the mare turns forward facing and enters into a stare down of sorts.
This is the challenge. This is a show of power and strength. While the outsider may be larger or stronger or faster, the mare carries with her the authority of the entire herd. She is not easily moved and if so she has the rest of the group behind her.
This goes back and forth between invitation and challenge as the outsider draws ever closer yet is kept in check by the mare’s direct stare from time to time. Eventually the outsider is “broken” into the herd and all is good.
Now as we translate that into our relationships with our children, coworkers, employees, neighbors, etc. The principles remain the same. We need to be gentle and open and welcoming. We need to be vulnerable and willing to let our guard down a little bit. We need to be more intentional about our sense of invitation when it comes to these and frankly all relationships.
But at the same time we need space to challenge one another. We need to set rules for our children to obey. We need to keep employees on task and coworkers need held accountable.
So as we go through life there needs to be a more intentional trade off between invitation and challenge. As Christians this is a great model for discipleship and growing in our faith development. We need to invite into a relationship with others. Jesus did this with the twelve disciples. But he didn’t let them get too comfy because soon he woudl send them out to do the stuff he was talking about. He told them that they would have to change. The old needs to go away and the new needs to be born into us.
This is the amazing and fantastic dichotomy of saint and sinner. We’re invited in through grace which is the good news of God. And because of that invitation our lives look different. It’s what James talked about in the bible. A faith without works is dead. There must be a life change that happens when we follow up on God’s invitation.
There’s a lot here so we’ll end at that. Invitation and challenge find a balance and strengthen relationships. Super simple just not always easy.
What a selfish, egotistical, pride filled bunch we’ve become! I mean seriously, here we are talking about national security and throwing millions of dollars at an inauguration event where no one is even allowed to attend. The media and many in our world and crying about a group of people entering into the capitol building. The only news we hear in America anymore is what happened in those moments when the capitol was breeched and a virus that continues to linger in our country.
But where was the coverage of the other atrocities around the world? Where are the posts in outrage over the 750 innocent killed in an attack in Ethiopia earlier this week? Where is the rage over the injustice that is levied upon men, women and children just because of their faith practices?
We’ve become so much a group of navel gazers that we can’t see the world around us. What has happened to us?! When did we start to care more about one man in or out of office that we forgot the world around us? When did my perceived problems become more important than the needs of those around me?
So many people flooded their social media feeds with remembrances of Martin Luther King Jr. yet were dead silent about the loss of life around the world. We talk about peace when our communities don’t have peace but when people out of our view don’t have peace we could care less. We grandstand on unifying people of every race, creed, color and gender; but do nothing when people of various races, creeds, colors and either gender are mocked, persecuted and killed just because of their heritage.
If we’re going to sit in our ivory towers and throw accusation grenades at the world around us, then we better put that pin back in and consider falling on that grenade ourselves. Don’t say you care about justice when you’re silent about injustice that doesn’t affect you. Don’t elevate one life while demeaning another. Don’t criticize people who don’t see the world the same way as you until you’re willing to honestly view your own part in the problem.
Don’t levy accusations without self evaluation.
True the invasion on our capitol was terrible. I don’t deny that. But in the grand scheme of life that was nothing. Many of those who are screaming and yelling about the violence weren’t impacted by the violence directly. How dare we sit in our 1st world societies with our technology and all of our creature comforts and be so self absorbed that we don’t even see the world around us? Perhaps we should be willing to say the names of the 750 killed in Ethiopia as loud as we shout the names of others in our world.
Pause and honestly look at your life. Are you making a mountain out of a molehill? Are you making a molehill out of a mountain? What role did you play in building that mountain? Think America. This is not who we are. It’s time to get back to our roots because this isn’t it!
If your social media feeds were anything like mine, they were filled with quotes from Martin Luther King Jr. Some of those quotes are really powerful and all of them are very true! I love seeing these quotes and would love it even more if we’d live by them instead of using them as mere advertisements.
But I do want to speak to those of you who quoted this man and threw his words all over the internet for one day out of the year. Do you live these words every other day? Do you actually believe the words King spoke? Do you think they are real?
I don’t think many of you do. I’m not trying to be negative or pessimistic or even judgmental. Just look at your feed last week or the week before. Did you fill your status on Facebook with how horrific the people were that went into the capital? Did you tweet about the man in the office on the other side of your political views as the enemy? Did you curse the other side for their violent and disturbing displays while defending those who did the same thing on your side of the aisle?
If you quote Martin Luther King, Jr. one day and throw stones at your neighbor the next you are part of the problem.
Friends we are not given the right to pick and choose what we wnat to believe and when we want to believe it. We need to be consistent. If you believe that Martin Luther King Jr. was a good man then quit spreading the well put together memes and start living the words on those memes. Quit dividing against your neighbor one day, only to shout how love conquers hate the next day.
If you really want to honor the legacy of men and women who have reformed our country into a better version of itself, then stop quoting them and start living how they lived. Be the difference maker don’t just say the words of a previous difference maker.
Look I get it! This isn’t the country you grew up in. There are ideologies around that don’t align with yours. There are people who live differently than you live. People aren’t always fair. Evil wins some days. And some people just flat suck at humanity. But get over yourself! When all you do is condemn the other person then lob these pithy statements from a really great man but don’t change how you see the world then you are the problem.
Stop with the quotes if you’re not going to live what the quote says! Just live the quote you want to display on your page. It will mean more and perhaps someone might actually be impacted because the words on your Facebook page won’t change anyone’s life if they don’t show up in your real life.
