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Category: Catalyst (Page 13 of 26)

A catalyst is one that sparks something. The catalyst speaks from experience and enables others to move forward more freely. These articles are written to act as a catalyst in your life.

Can You Really Have Your Best Life Now?

October 4, 2022 / / 0 Comments

Let’s get this out of the way right from the start. This is not an outright knock on a religious best selling book or its author, well not exactly. If someone told you, however, that you had the ability to have your best life in this moment, would you listen? Or like me, would you think there was some crazy catch, gimmick, or sales pitch coming your way? If you bear with me for a few minutes, I hope you are able to see that your best life really is possible and there’s no gimmicks, sales pitch, or any bait and switch attached to it.

Simply put I believe the message of Jesus in the Bible is one of having your best life right now. Don’t believe me? Read on.

The message of your best life now is often seen through the lenses of prosperity, wealth, power, and fame. All of those things that we can stock pile in our lives to elevate us above someone else are considered ways to have our best life right here and right now. But what about having our best life in some of the crappier moments in life?

The message of the Bible is one that totally throws the whole prosperity message on its head. Essentially, Jesus says that we can have our best life in the midst of the most fearful, dangerous, heart breaking, painful, lonely, hurting moments we could ever imagine.

It’s really less about circumstances and more about perspective. When Jesus came onto the scene the message of who God was, and what God wanted for his people, had become distorted at best. The idea of grace, goodness, mercy and forgiveness became things worked for and earned instead of free gifts given and received. It’s no wonder some people thought, and still think this way today, that we need to work harder for God’s blessings. It’s no surprise that we tend to think our best life only happens when things are going the way we want them to go.

So what does it take to have our best life now? I think it takes a change of heart. A different perspective. A less selfish approach to life. An others mentality. It’s really not important how you word it. The idea is simple. The way to have our best life now is to put someone else’s needs before our own. I know that it’s super counterintuitive, but that’s why it works so well.

Have you ever done something nice for someone else, like really just out of the goodness of your heart helped them? Then somewhere down the road some sort of blessing, benefit, good deed is done to you? Some call it karma or the universe repaying us. Others just call it good luck. But what if that’s the idea behind the real best life? What if the best life isn’t about amassing large amounts of things for ourselves and it’s really about serving those around you? What if our best life isn’t found in a padded checkbook but instead in the smile on a homeless man’s face when he receives a meal? What if it’s found in the gratitude of a widow when her needs are taken care of anonymously? What if our best life is found in spending time with a friend when he’s lost his wife, or she’s lost her job, or their child is ill? What if our best life is found in serving those around us with no strings attached and with no expectation of repayment?

I am a firm believer that we can and should have our best life right now. And to not have our best life now, in my mind is a misplaced understanding of who Jesus is and how he’s called us to live. The best life is a gospel filled life. The best life is a life that has its priorities straight. The best life is a life that keeps the main thing the main thing and doesn’t let personal ambition take the place of genuine love for those around us.

I think our best life isn’t just possible, it’s the only way to really have an enjoyable life.

Finger Pointing

September 22, 2022 / / 0 Comments

Do you remember that childish thing we did? You know when someone did something wrong, how we’d all make sounds of shock while pointing our finger at the wrong doer? We’d make sure the proper person in authority would know that she did it or he’s the guilty one. How annoying was that! I’m sure glad we stopped doing that. Or did we?

As annoying as that is and as almost embarrassing at it is to think about now, I’m starting to see a resurgence of this very way of handling problems. We might not point fingers and bemoan the situation with groans and other unintelligent sounds. But we do tend to throw some blame around.

There’s a tendency in our lives to publicly shame someone or belittle them when we don’t like how they’ve handled a situation. And honestly it makes us no better than those annoying turds we were growing up. It’s immature and quite frankly is counterproductive.

Have we become so focused on what others are doing wrong that we’ve forgotten what we’re called to do?

Let’s get this straight. This doesn’t mean we don’t call wrong – wrong! Actually just the opposite. It means that we call it wrong in the moment. NOT in friend groups or behind someone’s back. We don’t belittle someone who didn’t act or react how we would have liked. And for crying out loud, settling a dispute on social media just doesn’t work. So don’t even try that one.

There’s wisdom in the idea of getting our own house in order instead of tearing someone else’s house down. We’ve become a culture rich on tearing people down. Or at best just deleting them from our lives altogether. From blocking phone numbers to unfriending someone on social media, we can all but erase someone from existence with the click of a button. And it’s just like that childish game of tattle tale. Pointing our fingers at someone and trying to show the world how awful he is or how terrible of a person she is.

How about we try something new? Mind your own business. I mean seriously. How about instead of trying to undermine someone else and make their lives a living hell, we take a minute to focus on how we need a little grace shown to us? Let’s try to see what areas of life we’re not living 100% perfectly. Sure have your one on one conversations. Tell someone the honest truth, even if it hurts. Even if it means running the risk of losing something or someone special. But don’t get your panties in a bunch playing the finger pointing game.

The presence of social media and text messaging has raised a great crop of keyboard warriors who can sit with you face to face and seemingly have nothing bad to say. Then the moment they find their security behind a keyboard they can blast you to kingdom come. Or spread weird rumors about you that couldn’t be any less true.

If we were to realize who we are as individuals and what we’re called to do, then perhaps the shortcomings of others wouldn’t really be as bothersome. Maybe if we were as dedicated to our role in society as we are to someone else’s downfall in it, we could look beyond a slip of the tongue or meet a wrong doing with grace. The very same grace we ourselves expect when we mess up.

So in short perhaps we should get our own stuff together before we try dragging someone else’s name through the mud.

What’s Your Story?

September 9, 2022 / / 0 Comments

There’s nothing like a good story! If you get the right story, it can suck you in and almost pull you through it. All good stories have a few things in common. They have relatable characters, a good plot, generally there’s some good tension that needs to be worked out, and in most cases good stories have some form of a happy ending or at least a good resolution.

So what’s your favorite story? Why is it your favorite? Do these common ideas for good stories apply to your favorite story?

As I see it there’s a pretty straightforward way defining a story. Here’s my definition: a story is the life or adventure of a character who wants something and is willing to overcome challenge(s) to get it.

I think our lives are a lot like story as well. So often we get bored with our lives. We get bored with our relationships or with our jobs or with our hobbies. Why? I think it’s because we have lost the art of story in our day to day lives. We’ve stopped seeing the plot of our lives develop and our character progress through the narrative of life.

Think about your life as a story for a minute. You are the main character. There are protagonists (those are the good guys) and there are antagonists (those are the bad ones). Some of the bad guys are really bad and some of the good guys are, well nominally good at best and eventually prove to be not in your corner the way you thought.

Our lives have some form of adventure as well, even if it’s not climbing mountains or repelling off of buildings or saving the world. We can have adventure in driving to work or walking the dog or making dinner. There is adventure in just about every aspect of our lives if we just open our eyes to see it.

Our life has a plot as well. Although admittedly this one is an area of our lives that we don’t focus on nearly enough. What’s the plot of your life story? Do you even know what you’re about or why you’re here? This is your plot. The why behind the what of your day to day life. Without a plot we grow tired and wear out quickly. We burn out. We give up. We walk away. Not knowing our plot or having the wrong plot, i.e. life story, is what causes us to drift and lose focus on important relationships or even lose our jobs. The lack of plot, in my mind, is a huge factor in much of the depression we see in our world and honestly a significant factor in divorces, college drop outs and the inability to hold a steady carrier.

Think about marriage for a second. Marriage has a plot. But for many couples with children, those kiddos are the plot of their life. This is why so many couples have trouble when they become empty nesters. The kids were the plot to their story, and with no children around they seemingly have no plot. So little marriage tip – your children are not the point of your marriage. A product of it to be certain but they are not the point of it. The sooner you figure that one out the healthier your marriage will actually be.

Our faith lives are the same way. If our lives as followers of Jesus are only about the Sunday morning church attendance gig, then we’re doing it wrong. Then we’re going to burn out on “doing church.” We’re going to wander to the next church around the corner when this one doesn’t give us what we want. And quick hint…that new church won’t cut it forever either. That is until you figure out your story. Faith is about far more than going to church or giving an offering or singing a song or which book we use in worship. Faith is about story. It’s about your story and God’s story colliding in a fantastic adventure.

A life of faith is the adventure of a character who’s willing to overcome adversity to achieve something. This was what drove Jesus to do what he did for us. This is what took him to the cross and out of the grave. It was the story of salvation. Our story isn’t one of salvation. It’s the story of discipleship. This is what Jesus told us to do and what we’re supposed to be about daily.

Living a life of faith is about growing in our love for Jesus. It’s realizing every day just how loved we are by the one who created all things. It’s the story of loving one another and serving one another and being with one another. It’s about letting the image of Christ come to light in all we do.

So I guess now is the best time to start living that story!

When To Fight

August 26, 2022 / / 0 Comments

Doing the wrong thing for the right reason is still wrong. I know that this is not necessarily a popular opinion but it’s the truth. You can’t just throw away the right thing and do wrong because it’s not working for you in the moment. You can’t just do what you want even when the situation dictates otherwise.

I’ve been involved in a number of situations where one has to play a challenging game of teeter totter. But it shouldn’t be that difficult. When we truly understand right and wrong. When we truly value the power of truth, none of this should be an issue. The challenging part happens when we throw truth out the window and make everything in our day to day subjective. I’m sorry but you don’t have the right to change truth.

Look I get it. We all want to be in control from time to time, but you can’t throw the God card. It doesn’t work like that. You don’t have to believe in God to still value truth. And I hate to break it to you, but you cannot change truth. No matter how much you want to or how much you don’t like it, truth is truth whether you agree with it or not.

Think of it this way. I know it’s fairly simplistic and you might not think it applies in every situation but honestly if you really think about it changing truth is like changing something as simple as 1+1. Just because I don’t like the number 2 or don’t want the equation to equal 2 doesn’t give me the right to change the outcome of that formula. I mean I can’t say 1+1=4 and be anywhere near right. No matter how much I try to weasel my way around making it sound like the right answer. It never will be right.

The same is the case for altering standards of truth to fit your desires in the moment. You just can’t do that. Right is right. Wrong is wrong. Calling one the other doesn’t change reality at all!

So do the right thing. Whether you want to or not. Right will always be right even if everyone around you doesn’t like to hear it. It sure seems holding to the truth is no longer fashionable. You might lose out on a few things by holding to what’s right. But I am pretty sure that what you get by clinging to truth will be far better than anything (or anyone) you lose who can’t handle hearing the truth called out to them.

So when is it time to fight? When you’re fighting for truth not how you feel. When you’re fighting for something that surpasses your personal desire in the moment. Fight for the truth and you’ll always come out on top in the end (not always in the middle but in the end you will).

Time For A Little Adventure

August 24, 2022 / / 0 Comments

I think everyone likes a little adventure in their life. Some of us like a little a more vigorous type of adventure while others like a more tamed down and subdued version of adventure. Ask any guy to recount some of their most vivid memories in life and they’ll likely tell you something about a trip or an adventure. Some of our greatest memories are of adventures we’ve taken.

Now adventure isn’t all high risk and death defying stunts. It’s not necessarily like getting trapped in a board game like Jumanji, or racing at high rates of speed around the Porsche driving school test track. Yeah I was able to do that in a previous life, as they say. But the point isn’t how fast I drove, even though I could tell you all about the feelings of racing around the track. I could tell you how it felt to hit each curve and how close it felt we were to each other on the straight aways. The point is there was a sense of adventure that was born into my spirit as I was racing around the hot pavement!

Adventure is born into the souls of all people to be certain, but men have a need for adventure. In his book, Wild At Heart, John Eldredge talks about three things every man needs. We need a battle to fight, an adventure to conquer, and a beauty to pursue (or rescue). We hit on the battle fighting part of the equation here.

The adventure is part of our need to live out story. So much of life has become so tame that it loses its sense of fun. It’s almost boring some days when there’s no adventure. What things do you remember most? What was the adventure? What was the cause of the excitement?

I can remember the time someone broke into my parents’ home when I was there with a few of my siblings. I can tell you the details of the whole experience! I can tell you what it was like driving the youth around on scavenger hunts for our annual Christmas party at church. I can tell you about repelling off a tower and riding horses around Mad River. I don’t have the greatest memory necessarily. The only reason I remember these is because they were adventures to me.

You want to kill the spirit of a man? Make him sit behind a desk all his life and give him no adventure! Chain him to a 9-5 with no hobbies and he’ll wither away to a puddle of preteen boyhood.

Men it’s time to capture the adventure in life again. It’s ok to take some risks, but be wise about it. Look at the countless places in the Bible where God calls men to follow him. He will generally take them on an adventure. Through the wilderness. Up a mountain. Across a sea. On a boat ride in a storm. Why did he do it this way? Because he knows the soul of a man, what makes a man’s heart beat.

Our culture is beating the adventure out of men. We’re trying to tame the wild heart of a man. And it shows! Our culture is suffering because of it. Our world needs wild men to stand up and do the fighting adventurous pursuing and protecting thing that makes us who we are! Instead we’re cultivating a generation of boys who run from problems, are afraid to step out in fear of offending someone, and frankly can’t stand up for and protect the women and children in their lives because they’re too weak to handle a challenge.

Now some of you are going to get all upset that I’m coming down on men. And you know what, that’s ok. I have a plaque in my office that reads I would like to apologize to anyone I have not yet offended. Please be patient, I will get to you shortly. While this is not intended to intentionally piss anyone off, I know that some will not like it. I’m pretty sure the people of Jesus’ day didn’t like it when he called them nicely painted caskets – all pretty on the outside but dead as a doornail on the inside. That wasn’t polite and it sure did piss them off! They ended up killing Jesus for it.

But, like Jesus here, I’m not trying to be offensive. There is a masculinity issue in our culture and we’re all a bit to blame. Men are blamed for being too hard, abrupt, manly. We tell our boys to focus, calm down, quit with the jitters, don’t get all excited when things go wrong. Why? Isn’t that part of our natural response? Don’t you think there might be something beneficial in that kind of response?

Every man needs an adventure! And no! Video games are not the same thing! We need a purpose and some form of excitement in life. When we don’t have an adventure to live out, we fall into bad habits and do things that just aren’t right.

So men find that adventure. Set out on the adventure of a lifetime. It’s called manhood and brother – it’s a thrilling ride!

Time to Fight!

August 22, 2022 / / 0 Comments

In my previous post, I referred to a book that basically addressed the three things every man needs in his life. We called those a battle to fight, an adventure to conquer and a beauty to pursue. These ideas come from the book Wild at Heart by John Eldredge. If you have a guy in your life, whether husband – boyfriend – child or dad, I do recommend this book. If you’re raising daughters, I still recommend this book so they know what a man looks like in a world filled with boys.

The first thing a man needs in his life is a battle to fight. I know that sounds a tad morbid and maybe a little pushing the envelop too much but I definitely agree with this in my own life! Just look at how we live or lives as men. We love to fight. Not fist fight or beat someone up or shoot someone. I don’t mean we’re all evil villains or anything like that. But something happens in a man when a fight presents itself.

Again, before we get too far into this, remember this is not a gender bashing seminar. I’m not talking men over women or anything like that. This is just a way to look at the men in your life and understand a little about what makes us tick. There’s a companion to this book which I’ll be reading next and I’ll give a similar summary for women. This is not saying that women can’t fight or don’t have a fight instinct. I know plenty of women that seem to enjoy a good fight from time to time. But the inner workings of a man need a fight.

So it’s time for war then right?

Not so fast. That’s not exactly what we’re talking about with fight. The idea of a battle to fight is embedded in most every video game boys gravitate toward. It’s written on the hearts of the boys who all they want to do is join the military and defend (read fight for) their country. It’s written in the instincts of married men to defend and fight for their families.

There are some outliers here but at the heart of every man who desires to be a man is the need to fight for what is in their life. Fight for their wives and children. It’s why if someone breaks into our home in the middle of the night, we jump to see what’s going on instead of throw our wives out in front of us. It’s the fight instinct that is built into men.

I believe that’s part of how God designed us and if we’re not living up to this instinct and fighting for our families, then we’ve abandoned God’s design for our lives. Essentially we’re not really men anymore.

This fight instinct is what drives most men to work harder. It’s what makes them want to beat the car beside them off the line at a red light as if they were in a drag race. It’s what makes their heart race and blood pressure swell when they see someone in danger.

There’s one drawback however. Most of the time the man inside is a bit of a pansy. And by that I mean most of the time men pick the easier battle to fight and run from the one that takes more time and effort and energy. This is why some guys fall for porn or extra-marital affairs. It’s because they don’t have the guts to fight hard enough. Being married isn’t easy. Not sure who ever convinced you it would be, but it isn’t. Two different lives are blended as one. That doesn’t sound easy to me at all! But it’s not just marriage. It’s virtually everywhere in life. Doing what’s right is generally the harder task. Dieting isn’t easy. Eating healthy isn’t easy. Exercise isn’t easy. Creating a healthy mental routine isn’t easy. But it’s all necessary!

So what then?

Whether you’re a guy or you have one in your life who you call husband or son, there are some things you might want to consider.

  1. Don’t try to tame the wild heart. All too often we tell our sons to be more gentle or to calm down or don’t get so worked up. Sorry but no. That’s just not going to cut it. Men need to be able to be wild at heart as the book title demonstrates. We need to be able to swell up and fight when the time is right. Don’t make tame what God created wild.
  2. Learn to redirect. The issue with most boys is that they don’t know how to direct their excitement or passion. Their instinct to fight hasn’t been honed yet so most boys don’t know how to fight appropriately given the circumstances. Teach your sons not to calm down but how and when to be excited. Show them what it means to be controlled even in the throws of a battle. Teach them what it means to fight for what is worth fighting for and not fall for the lies that will end up leaving you empty when pursued.
  3. Be present. We’ll get to this one later but the best thing for a boy becoming a man is to have a dad who’s present fighting for them and their mom. Boys learn from their dads by what they say and what they do. So dads set the right example. It’s far too easy to run to our work, hobbies, other interests. When you’re home, then be home. Don’t take your parental task lightly.

So it’s time to fight and I mean really fight for the things and people in our lives we care about. If it’s hard, don’t back down. If things get challenging and we think it should be easier, don’t take the easy way out and run. Don’t give up just because you’re having a hard day, month, year or even decade. Be a man and fight. Do the hard work. Put in the hard time. Fight because that’s what you were made for! Anything else is giving in to the wimp that Satan wants you to be.

Boys and Guns

August 16, 2022 / / 0 Comments

I still remember the day we sent my sons to stay with my in-laws over night. I wasn’t nervous about them going or worried I was going to miss them too much. I mean my in-laws did a pretty good job raising their three daughters. They would be just fine. But that’s what got me. Three daughters. My boys are not daughters. They are boys. And they were just at the age where they were really intrigued with playing with toys.

Whether it was racing toy cars around or building with blocks, they loved to make things work. It was just who they were. But they were going to a home that had only seen girls. All girls meant all girl toys. Now don’t get your panties in a bunch or anything. I wasn’t afraid if they played with a doll or something they’d somehow change identities. I just was a little concerned that they didn’t have anything to play with is all. But was I ever surprise…

Boys have something that is born into their DNA. As author John Eldredge explains in his book Wild At Heart, males have three things they need. They need a battle to fight, an adventure to conquer and a beauty to pursue. No one has to teach a male child any of these things. They just kind of happen.

Battle to Fight

Ever wonder who came up with the ideas of hockey, football, even golf? They were dudes. They were men who needed to fight something, even if it was a tiny white ball in the middle of the grass. Getting out there and smacking a ball into oblivion somehow spoke to the battle sense of a man. You don’t have to teach a male child how to fight for what’s right. And you really shouldn’t try to teach them out of that fight instinct either!

The idea of having a battle to fight and having men willing to jump into that role has kept us in a safe place in the greatest country the world has ever seen. Men needing a battle to fight is what took one of my sons into service in the US Army. Needing a battle to fight is what saved that weekend at grandmas too.

You see when we picked them up, I was amazed at what I saw. Both of my boys were playing with Barbie dolls. But not exactly how one normally plays with dolls! They had them contorted in some way to make them look like guns. They, without any provocation or enticement from anyone, took the dolls and folded their arms as a handle. Then made the noises of guns. We didn’t have guns in the house at the time. We didn’t watch war movies or really much of anything but Veggie Tales in front of them. So where did they get it? A need for a battle to fight. It was born into them.

Adventure to Conquer

Eldredge says that men need more than just a good fight. They also need to find adventure in life. We’ll pick these apart a tad more in the next couple of weeks, but the gist is that men like to find new territory. Climb to new heights. Make things into an adventure. Just look at how boys play. They build forts. Have wars to fight. Even the video games that most guys grab are all about adventure and battle.

Beauty to Pursue

Ladies this one is for you. Men have an innate desire to fight for, protect and provide for the woman in their lives. Now as a guy, I can admit we don’t always do it correctly. But the idea is there. We want to provide for the family. We will do anything to protect our wife. We wouldn’t trade that for the world, well most of the time. Again, we’ll hit on how this goes awry in a future post.

There are some key things that make men who and what they are. These three ideas are some of the basic elements of what it mens to be a man. Please don’t read this as all men are like this, because there are some outliers. Also don’t read that no women have these same desires or abilities. The purpose here is to see how a man’s mind is wired. It’s a fundamental part of how we were built.

And, as a follower of Jesus, I think this is very much part of how God designed us to live in his image. But we can hit that topic another time. For now cherish the “man’ness” of that guy in your life. Don’t try to stifle what appears to be a violent streak when he talks about war or gathers his arsenal for the zombi apocalypse. Don’t get worried when he looks for adventure around every turn. And remember that his goal is to pursue the beauty in his life. Sometimes that doesn’t look how you might want it to but if he’s logging extra hours and making sure there’s cash in the bank to have that great vacation you’re wanting…yep that’s likely part of this pursuit.

All in all, men don’t need to be taught how to be men as long as there’s a strong male influence in their lives. So dads don’t slack on this one. It’s time to log off the computer for a bit, come in from the shop, set aside some real time to be with your family. Whether you’re a dad of boys or girls, they need to see what a real man is like around the house.

Compounding Effort?

August 4, 2022 / / 0 Comments

We’ve all at least heard of compounding interest. Maybe you don’t know what it means or how it works, but I’m sure you’ve heard of the concept. I’m not going to get into all the details on how compounding interest affects you, but the idea is that the interest on one day compounds or adds to the interest the next and so on. You financial people give me a little break here. That’s the best one liner description I could come up with!

So what about effort and what does compounding interest have to do with anything other than money?

Great! I’m so glad you asked! If you take the basics of compounding interest and apply that to other areas of life you’ll see that we can do a lot of great things if we just let all of the effort and ability we have work together. Let me explain using a little churchy terminology.

In the church world we have three T’s we talk about from time to time. They are time, talents, and treasures. Normally we will make it a point to talk about our time and how we use it. Then our talents or abilities and how we use those. And finally our treasures and how we spend, invest and give those away. But how often do we look at them on a compounding scale?

Think about it for a second. When we take our time and use it for one purpose. Then our talents for a different purpose. And finally our treasure to fund or support a similar yet different purpose, how much good can we actually do? It’s like helping 3 different groups a little when we could make a bigger impact if we compounded our effort.

Imagine instead seeing a specific ministry of the local church and diving into that ministry fully. I mean using your time, talent and treasures all in the same place. Not only do you give of your dollars to support that ministry, but you also volunteer serving others through that very same ministry. And to add to it, you have a unique (or not so unique but still needed) skill that you use in your volunteering to accomplish something in that very same ministry.

Essentially you just more than tripled your gift to that ministry! It’s like the difference between giving $50 to 3 organizations or giving $150 to one. Your gift makes a much larger impact when you compound it.

So whether you’re a church kind of person or not, consider how you can compound your effect. Think where you’re spending your time, ability and money. Are they all lined up in the same direction? How can you have a bigger impact by realigning your priorities?

In short layering our giving with our volunteering and the use of our skills can have an exponentially larger impact!

Where Did They Go?

August 1, 2022 / / 0 Comments

I’ll be the first to admit it. It can be a tad irritating at times. Some people have seemingly fallen off the map in the past couple of years. I wonder frequently where did “so and so” go? But I wonder if that’s the best take on things…

So before I get too far into this, let me reassure you that this is in no way a slam on anyone who’s moved on. It’s not about any one person in particular actually. And this is not about the person who hasn’t reconnected yet either. This is about those who seem to focus more on the one(s) who’ve gone and not returned than we focus on the one(s) who are right there with us still.

I have the opportunity in my job to work with a lot of churches, but this doesn’t only apply to churches! One common thread in many of my conversations with pastors and church leaders revolves around those people who left during the uncertainty of the pandemic and just haven’t returned. It’s a condition that many institutions and groups are facing actually. Once active and heavily engaged individuals just disappearing without so much as an email, phone call or text message.

It’s hard to see this for anyone and even worse when some of these people who’ve just flat vanished are close friends. But I have a feeling our focus in this whole situation is a bit off.

I was talking with a church recently about this very issue. Where have they gone? Why are they not back yet? We need to get them to reconnect. How do we do attract them to come back again?

While I totally understand this way of thinking. And I’ve even thought it myself a few times, this is not the healthiest or even most beneficial way of thinking. I’m curious have we started to focus so much on the ones who are not back that we’ve disregarded the ones who are right there in front of us?

I fear the answer to this question is yes. I believe that our desire to have these missing faces back and re-engaged in the group has caused us to neglect and even ignore those who are willing, able and ready to serve.

Specifically to church leaders: if you want to re-engage those who’ve walked away start with the ones who are still involved. Get them excited about ministry. Share the work of the church with them. The Bible tells us that we’re supposed to equip the saints for works of ministry. But all too often we gather them together and make them watch us do ministry then complain when they leave because they’re bored.

In one of the many books I’ve read recently, I found a principle for moving an organization or group of people. I think it was in the book Tipping Point, but can’t be certain. The idea is basically that focusing on the late adopters (or those who’ve disconnected and refuse to reconnect) is fruitless, painful and exhausting. It yields very little by way of positive results. The author suggests to pour into the ones who are early to middle adopters, those who are right there already doing the work or at minimum watching it being done.

When these current workers and watchers get going and get excited, there will be a trickle down effect to the rest of the organization. So the long and short is that it’s not bad to miss those who’ve gone, but they can’t be the focus. If we focus on those who are right there with us even half as much as we do those who are gone, we’d be shocked how exciting life in any organization can truly be.

The Missing Generation?

July 21, 2022 / / 0 Comments

So there’s this thing that’s making the rounds in the church world that there is a whole generation of young people that are missing out on something in the church. I think that’s kind of bogus, but I guess you can believe what you want on that topic. If you stick around for a few minutes here I’d like to explain why I think this metric is bunk and what we can do to change the perception a bit.

For starters I wonder if we’re looking at things wrongly? I mean what qualifies a missing generation? Does it mean no one from that generation is at all engaged? Does it mean they’re not in worship? Has this generation told us they want nothing to do with us? And really the important question in my mind is are they really missing or are we just missing them?

You see the problem, as I see it, isn’t that they’re missing. These high school, college and post college young people aren’t necessarily absent from the ways of Jesus. They’re just not in our buildings the way we would hope. They don’t function like previous generations functioned. But is that really a bad thing?

I’ve talked in many settings before about our metrics being off and measuring things that really aren’t the best sets of measurements. What if we’re seeing an entire generation actually care more about doing the things of Jesus instead of sitting around and only learning about the ways of Jesus?

What I’ve experienced in my context is that these younger generations aren’t really all that caught up in sitting for 60-75 minutes to hear someone spout off cool ideals about Jesus only to go home. And the way our current system is designed, that’s pretty much what a Sunday morning feels like to some. The congregation is for the majority passively observing. There’s little room for engagement around the truths of Jesus. Then we send people home to figure it out or live your life so you can come back next week for another shot in the arm of our tradition and teachings.

Can we shift our focus? Is it possible to remain true to our understanding of the Bible along with our confessional practices and move from doing ministry to this generation to doing ministry with this generation. It’s all about including them in the works of ministry. And yes it’s actually biblical!

The idea that we are to curate believers who passively sit and watch a show on a Sunday is not only off-putting but frankly it has no grounding in scripture whatsoever! The early church was dynamic and moving. It was about gathering to learn and grow and be challenged just as much as it was about going out to love and serve and give to our neighbors in need. We talk a big game but when it comes to actually putting our boots on the ground, we get a little lazy to put it mildly.

I really believe we need to shift our thinking from merely counting people in attendance to including them in acts of ministry for the sake of the world around us. When we do this, we’ll realize that this generation is not lost after-all. As a matter of fact, they’re likely doing this stuff without us at best. But even at worst they’re sitting back waiting for us to do something of some relevance to the people we say we are to love in Jesus’ name.

Now don’t get all freaked out about the word relevance. The gospel is relevant. Jesus is relevant. Nothing we can do will change that at all. But the church as an institution and even as a people have become less relevant because it sure appears all we care about sometimes are boards, budgets and butts in seats.

You want to find the lost generation? Do something that serves, loves and gives to the marginalized in your community and you’re guaranteed to find them, hiding in plain sight, where we’ve refused to look.

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