living for eternity today

Category: Leadership (Page 2 of 19)

3 Ways to End the Year with Grace

As the year winds down, it’s natural to reflect on the 12 months that are now in the rearview mirror. For some of us, it feels like we just blinked and suddenly December is over! For others, this year might have felt like climbing a steep hill—slow and challenging. Wherever you land on that spectrum, the way we end one year and begin another matters more than we might realize. It sets the tone for our lives, families, and our faith journeys.

Here are three simple ways to finish this year well and start the new one on the right foot (or the left one if you’d prefer):


1. Reflect and Celebrate God’s Faithfulness

Psalm 77:11 says, “I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your wonders of old.” (ESV) Reflection is a spiritual discipline that allows us to pause and recognize God’s faithfulness in our lives. Even in the hardest seasons, there are moments of grace worth celebrating.

Take some time this week to write down your “God Moments” from the year. Maybe it was an answered prayer, a new relationship, or even finding peace in a difficult situation. Share these moments with your family or friends. Celebrate them! I’ve heard it said that we replicate what we celebrate.

Ending the year in gratitude prepares our hearts to embrace the new year with hope and trust in God’s continued faithfulness. Gratitude isn’t just a nice idea—it’s a transformative practice that reshapes how we see the world and God’s work in it.


2. Clear the Clutter

Hebrews 12:1 reminds us to “lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely.” (ESV) That’s not just a verse for Lent; it’s an invitation for daily living. As you prepare to step into the new year, consider what might be cluttering your life—both spiritually and physically.

Spiritually, is there unforgiveness you need to let go of? Habits that pull you away from God? Relationships that need mending? Take time to pray and release those burdens to God.

Physically, go through that closet, garage, or junk drawer you’ve been avoiding. It’s amazing how decluttering our spaces can create mental clarity and a sense of renewal. Plus, donating items you no longer need blesses others and reflects Christ’s generosity.

Starting the year with a clean heart and clean spaces makes room for God to do new and exciting things in your life.


3. Set Intentional Goals with God in the Center

Proverbs 16:3 says, “Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.” (ESV) Goals are great, but goals without God’s guidance often leave us feeling frustrated or aimless. As you look ahead, take some time to pray over your plans for the new year.

What areas of your life need more of God’s presence? Maybe you want to deepen your prayer life, read through the Bible, or serve in a new ministry at church. Write down your goals and ask God to lead you in them. Don’t forget to include your family in this process. Talk about what goals you can pursue together, like family devotions or serving your neighborhood. Then share them with someone who can hold you accountable. A goal worth making is a goal worth accomplishing!

And remember: grace over perfection. The goal isn’t to have it all figured out by January 1st or December 31st for that matter. It’s to walk faithfully with Jesus one step at a time.


Looking Ahead

As we prepare to welcome a new year, let’s do so with hearts full of gratitude, lives freed from clutter, and goals anchored in God’s plans. No matter what this past year has held, God has been with us every step of the way, and His promises remain sure as we step into the future.

May this be the year where we grow deeper in our faith, love our neighbors more intentionally, and see God work in ways we couldn’t even imagine. Let’s finish strong and step boldly into what God has for us next.

Happy New Year, friends! Let’s make it one that honors Him in every way.

Merry Christmas

As we celebrate the birth of Jesus, I find myself overflowing with gratitude for each of you. This past year, we’ve seen God’s hand moving powerfully in and through our church family. Together, we’ve lived out our mission to help busy families experience the grace of Jesus, and we’ve done so in ways that truly embody the joy and hope of this Christmas season.

This year has been one of growth and transformation. Our worship services continue to bring strangers into our community, and we’ve watched them become family. Our KidConnect Worship and Littles Connect Sunday school have taken on a new face, introducing more young hearts to Jesus’ love. We’ve supported parents with new ministries, and Delco Youth is reaching more young people than ever, helping them find meaning and hope in Christ. These aren’t just ministries—they’re evidence of God at work.

We’ve also laid some strong foundations for the future. With three full-time and one part-time staff members, our team is more equipped than ever to meet the needs of our growing church family. We’ve also been actively preparing for some significant ministry enhancements, which will serve both our members and our wider community. Our focus on families reflects a heart for bringing people closer to Jesus.

As we look forward, I’m excited about the blessings God has in store for us at Living Word Galena. Our vision to become a community focused church is coming to life. I see it in every smile, every hug, every handshake, and every story of transformation shared within these walls. The new year holds so much potential—not just in numbers, but in lives changed by the grace of Jesus.

Christmas reminds us that God stepped into our world to bring hope, peace, love, and joy. As we celebrate the birth of Jesus, let’s also celebrate the ways we’ve seen His light shine through our church family this year. Thank you for being part of this mission, for your prayers, your service, and your love for one another.

May this Christmas season be filled with His presence and the new year overflow with His blessings.

Pastor Derrick

Margin Matters

Are you tired? Overwhelmed? Running on fumes? Let me be brutally honest with you—it’s probably your own fault. We (and yes I place myself in this category as well) tend to cram our lives full of stuff—appointments, errands, commitments, notifications, endless scrolling—and then wonder why we feel suffocated. The truth is, you’ve built a life with no breathing room. No margin.

And without margin, you’re not living—you’re surviving, barely.

Margin isn’t just a luxury; it’s a necessity. It’s the white space on the page, the pause in the music, the Sabbath in your week. Without it, everything blends into a chaotic blur, and you miss the moments that actually matter.

The Myth of More

We live in a culture that idolizes more. More productivity. More activities for the kids. More money. More accomplishments. But more isn’t making us happier—it’s making us miserable.

Here’s the kicker: the significant things in life—real relationships, awe-inspiring moments, hearing God’s still, small voice—rarely happen when you’re running at 110%. They happen in the margins.

Think about it:

  • That deep conversation with your son? It didn’t happen during soccer practice, piano lessons, and PTA meetings. It happened on the quiet drive home.
  • The time you truly connected with your spouse? It wasn’t during a whirlwind of errands. It was in the stillness of an unhurried evening.
  • That moment when God spoke to your heart? You weren’t rushing to the next thing. You were still, quiet, and listening.

When your life is too full, you bulldoze right over these sacred moments. You’re too busy with the minutia—emails, to-do lists, keeping up appearances—to notice the magnificent.

Let’s be honest for a second: most people don’t leave margin because it feels uncomfortable. We wear busyness like a badge of honor. If your calendar isn’t full, you feel unimportant. Lazy. Maybe even worthless.

But let me tell you something hard: filling your life with stuff is a lousy substitute for meaning.

Jesus didn’t run around like a headless chicken. He walked. He took time to pray. He noticed the lilies of the field and the birds of the air. His ministry was profound not because He was busy, but because He was present.

Five Simple Ways To Create Margin

  1. Say “No” and Mean It
    Stop being a people pleaser. Every “yes” to something unimportant is a “no” to what truly matters. Your time is precious—guard it like it’s your life (because it is).
  2. Ditch the Unnecessary
    Do you really need to binge another Netflix series? Spend hours scrolling Instagram? Join every committee at church? No. Free up that space for something meaningful.
  3. Schedule the Sacred
    Block off time for rest, relationships, and reflection. If it’s not on your calendar, it won’t happen. Treat this time as non-negotiable.
  4. Embrace Silence
    Turn off the noise. Put down your phone. Be still. You’ll be shocked at how much clarity comes when you stop trying to fill every moment.
  5. Rediscover Wonder
    Take a walk. Watch the sunset. Listen to your kid’s laughter. These things aren’t just filler—they’re the point.

God designed us to need margin. That’s why He gave us the Sabbath—not to burden us, but to free us. When you leave space in your life, you’re making room for God to move.

Psalm 46:10 doesn’t say, “Work harder and know that I am God.” It says, “Be still and know that I am God.” You can’t be still if you’re sprinting from one thing to the next.

A No So Simple Challenge

This week, I dare you—no, I double dare you—to cut something out of your calendar. Say no to one thing. Block off time to rest. Let go of your obsession with doing it all.

And in that space, watch what happens. You’ll start to breathe again. You’ll start to notice things. And maybe—just maybe—you’ll start to come alive again.

Margin isn’t optional. It’s where life happens. Don’t miss it.

Leaders Multiply

If you’re not mentoring others, you’re missing the point of leadership. The best leaders aren’t the ones who do everything themselves—they’re the ones who build up others to lead effectively and carry the mission forward. And if you’re not willing to do that, you’re not a leader—you’re a bottleneck.

This isn’t an issue in the world; it’s an issue in the church too. The church doesn’t need a single superstar. We need a team of leaders empowered to make disciples, serve passionately, and spread the Gospel. Jesus didn’t come to make an all-star solo career. He came to multiply. He poured into His disciples, investing deeply, and sent them out with authority to do even greater things. That’s real leadership. If He could trust people to continue His mission, we have no excuse not to do the same.

Mentorship Isn’t Optional—It’s Essential

Too many pastors and ministry leaders are burning out because they refuse to share the load. They micromanage, hold onto tasks with a white-knuckle grip, and avoid handing over real authority. This isn’t servant leadership; it’s ego, pure and simple. Here’s the hard truth: if you’re not mentoring, you’re not multiplying. And if you’re not multiplying, you’re failing in your role as a leader.

You’re not called to carry the whole load by yourself. You’re called to build others up. And let’s be honest—if your ministry collapses the moment you step back, you didn’t build a ministry. You built a one-man show. The church deserves better than that, and so does the Kingdom.

Mentorship means giving up some control, and for some of us, that’s terrifying. We’re afraid someone else won’t do it “our way.” Spoiler alert: they probably won’t, and that’s okay! The goal is to equip others to lead in their own unique ways, with their own God-given gifts. God doesn’t call clones; He calls disciples, each with a different role and each with a unique approach.

Mentoring means letting people lead, even if they might stumble. Growth often comes through failure, and it’s better for future leaders to make small mistakes now, with guidance, than to have the entire weight of leadership fall on them unprepared.

Real Leaders Make Room for Others

Some leaders seem terrified that empowering others will make them “replaceable.” Well, here’s a wake-up call: you should be replaceable! The church isn’t built on any single person’s charisma or skillset. It’s built on Jesus, and He made room for others, showing that real leadership is about serving others and preparing them to serve, not building up our own reputations.

Jesus invested in 3 of His disciples. Then mentored the 12. But eventually he sent out the 72 and even more as we look through the book of Acts. He didn’t keep the role of leading the church through the New Testament to Himself, so why are we? Why are we making it so hard for people to use their gifts for God’s glory? Why are we clinging to our traditions and our way of doing things, when it’s obviously not reaching the people in our own backyards let alone in our modern Samaria and end of the earth scenarios!

Mentorship allows you to multiply your impact, making your ministry stronger, more resilient, and able to reach far beyond what you could ever do alone. The legacy of a true leader isn’t found in what they achieved on their own; it’s in the lives they impacted and the leaders they raised up.

Building up others takes time, energy, and intentionality. It’s about conversations, encouragement, correction, and shared experiences. And here’s the kicker: if you’re too busy to mentor, then you’re doing ministry wrong. Jesus made time for His disciples. He taught them, walked with them, and sent them out to lead. We need to do the same.

Don’t be a leader who hoards influence. Be a leader who multiplies. Start mentoring others, not because it’s nice to do but because it’s essential for the growth of God’s Kingdom. A ministry that invests in people instead of projects? That’s a ministry that will stand the test of time.

Passing the Baton

One of the most critical responsibilities of a leader is preparing for the day when he or she is no longer in charge. But all too often in the church world we avoid this like the plague. Maybe it’s pride? Maybe it’s fear of being replaced, or perhaps it’s a lack of trust in others. Whatever the reason, leaders who don’t plan for succession set their ministry up for failure.

It’s really no secret, no one stays in leadership forever. Whether it’s due to retirement, illness, burnout, or simply moving on, a leadership transition is inevitable. Yet, too many leaders behave as if they’ll be in the driver’s seat forever. This mentality is not only unwise, it’s selfish. Refusing to prepare for the next leader is a surefire way to see the ministry crumble when you’re no longer around.

Jesus even modeled succession. He spent years pouring into His disciples, teaching them, empowering them, and preparing them to carry on the mission once He was gone. He didn’t just hope they would figure it out on their own. He invested in them so the ministry could thrive. He gave them authority and then released them to lead.

The harsh truth: If you’re not preparing your successor, you’re building your ministry on your own ego, not the Gospel. And that’s a recipe for disaster.

Succession Is About the Future, Not Your Legacy

Many leaders get so caught up in their own legacy that they forget leadership isn’t about them—it’s about the mission. If your leadership crumbles the moment you’re gone, you weren’t building His Kingdom. You were building a monument to yourself. Succession is about ensuring the ministry continues to grow and thrive long after you’re no longer in the picture.

The church’s mission doesn’t end when you do. It’s much bigger than any one person, and we should be leading in a way that reflects that truth.

Succession planning isn’t just about finding the next person to fill your seat. It’s about building up leaders who can take the ministry further than you ever could. Your job as a leader is to invest in people, not just in programs or systems. When you pour into others, you’re ensuring the next generation of leaders is stronger and more prepared than you were.

This requires intentionality. It means mentoring younger leaders, giving them real responsibility, and letting them make mistakes. Too often, leaders hesitate to share authority because they’re afraid the next generation will mess things up or won’t do it the way we prefer it to be done. Newsflash: they will do it differently and they will mess things up. And that’s okay. Growth happens through failure. Your job is to guide them through it, not protect them from it.

Many leaders wait until they’re burned out or ready to retire before thinking about succession. By then, it’s too late to effectively pass the baton. A sudden leadership vacuum can lead to disarray, division, and even collapse.

Start early. Start now. Begin investing in future leaders long before you’re ready to leave. Succession planning should be part of your ongoing leadership strategy, not an afterthought.

In the end, leadership is about stewardship. You’re holding a position temporarily. Your job is to steward it well and then pass it on to someone else who can run with it. If you’re not preparing for that, you’re missing the mark. Let go of your pride, and start raising up the next generation of leaders today.

The Overflow Life

When you look around, what do you see? A world that’s empty and bleak? Or a world bursting with possibility? I’m reminded of this question every spring when I plant my garden. A couple envelops of seeds sure don’t look like much. But in a few months those seeds become full grown plants that produce far more fruit and vegetables than I could imagine.

In the Genesis account, God didn’t just create for the sake of filling empty space. He made a world designed to be overflowing with life. Creation itself is a testimony to the abundance mindset that God has built into the very fabric of existence.

Every created thing has within it the power to bring forth something new. Fruit contains seeds, allowing them to reproduce and grow more fruit. Animals and humans, have the ability to reproduce and fill the earth. God didn’t design creation to be a one-and-done deal. He built it with the potential for multiplication, for abundance, for more. He planted a cycle of increase right into nature itself.

But here’s the secret we seem to have forgotten: this abundance mindset wasn’t just for creation—it’s meant for us too. Yet, many of us live with a scarcity mindset. We focus on what we lack instead of what we have. We look at the challenges, the struggles, and the limitations, and we convince ourselves that there just isn’t enough. Not enough time, not enough resources, not enough opportunities, not enough love, not enough grace. But when did God ever say there wouldn’t be enough?

Creation isn’t the only thing He filled with potential. He also filled you with potential. You have been made in His image, crafted by the Creator who designed this entire system of overflow. But so many times, we find ourselves operating out of fear, out of worry, out of this scarcity mindset that tells us we’ll never have enough. And it’s killing us.

The Bible is filled with reminders of God’s abundance. Look at how Jesus fed thousands with just a five loaves and two fish, and he even had leftovers. He turned water into wine, and I don’t mean a cup of it but gallons upon gallons! And when He said, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full,” He wasn’t talking about a mediocre, halfway kind of life. He was talking about an abundance of love, grace, and purpose.

A Mindset Shift

Now, don’t get me wrong: abundance doesn’t mean we’re all going to be swimming in cash or never facing tough times. This isn’t some backhanded way of talking about some form of prosperity gospel. It means that we stop letting fear and lack of anything dictate our lives. We stop saying, “I can’t,” and start asking, “What has God called me to do?”

The Apostle Paul talks about being content whether in plenty or in want (Philippians 4:12-13). Contentment isn’t settling for less. It’s the confidence that whether you have little or much, God’s got you. And let’s face it—God’s version of “little” is often more than we think.

But the problem is, so many of us don’t realize what we’ve been given. We see our lives as empty baskets instead of containers brimming with seeds. But remember, seeds don’t just grow on their own; they need planting. They need water, sunlight, and care. It’s time to plant seeds of abundance in our lives, our churches, and our communities.

Abundance is a Lifestyle

When we start to live with an abundance mindset, we begin to see opportunities where others see obstacles. We start seeing potential where others see problems. We become people who give freely, who love deeply, and who live fully.

Our churches need this mindset too. Are we going to be a church that hoards what we have, fearing it will run out? Or are we going to believe in the overflow? We have to step out in faith, believing that the same God who created this world of abundance can provide what we need to grow, to reach, and to impact more lives.

An abundance mindset isn’t just a nice idea; it’s a choice. It’s a choice to believe that God has given you enough to be a blessing, to make a difference, and to step out boldly. It’s a choice to look at your life, your church, your community, and see not what is lacking, but what is possible.

So, how are you going to live? Are you going to be someone who sits back, afraid of running out? Or are you going to be someone who steps out, believing that the God who made fruit with seeds, animals with the ability to reproduce, and humans with the power to create has also given you everything you need to live abundantly?

Let’s stop thinking small. Let’s step into the overflow. Because when you live with an abundance mindset, you’re not just living for yourself. You’re becoming a part of God’s plan to keep creation multiplying, thriving, and changing the world.

One Of My Favorite Days

Historically this was one of my favorite days. It was still a bit eerie but stands out as quite the amazing day nonetheless.

The skies were still empty. Life still was standing still for the most part.

Businesses were closed in some sectors of the country. Schools weren’t sure if they should open or close. Churches opened their doors wide up to welcome any and all who just needed some form of comfort and hope.

The dust was still covering most of Manhattan. The military mights from across the spectrum of our allied nations were jockeying for prime position to have the greatest impact of retaliation.

But more notable for me was the way we all bled the same color that day.

Today I hear a lot about blues and reds and even the blended purple of states across this nation. But that day our blood flowed the same. Our hearts beat as one.

It was cool to hear God Bless America playing in random places. People were flying the American Flag that had never flown one before. While I have no real stats on this, I’d imagine flag sales went through the roof as the entire nation became one mass of patriotism.

The day before we suffered a catastrophic blow but it wasn’t fatal. Sure thousands would lose their lives that day but the nation as a whole wasn’t crushed. We stumbled. We even fell on our face for a moment. But on 9.12 we could be seen in a kneeling posture regaining composure. We were gathering our whits and evaluating our surroundings.

Together we cared for loved ones. Together we looked out for neighbors. Together we stood to sing our national anthem. Together we paused when we saw a flag flying. Together we lifted the wounded and grieved with those who mourned.

We were stronger because we did it together.

It was truly one of my favorite days. I look around and long for that feeling again. I see how we handle election season and see how weak we’ve become. We’re not weak because we are a weak nation. We’re weak because we’re so divided. I think back to the great fall through the years of the pandemic. We suffered greatly because we didn’t do it together.

You’d think we’d learn, but I fear we’re too self absorbed to learn from one another. The best we can do is lay down our differences and put aside our agendas and focus on those around us.

It truly was one of my favorite days because we lived up to our name. Divided we will fall. But that day united we stood, stronger than ever.

If only we remembered

The pictures are everywhere today. Photoshopped images with super imposed phrases. 

Never forget. 

We will always remember. 

If only we remembered.

In the moment it was devastating. I will certainly remember forever where I was. I’ll remember as I heard the first airplanes go overhead. Fighter jets scrambled from the local airport. It’s not something I heard every day. 

The images that filled our television screens were horrific at best. Smoke and dust filled the air. People were crying, others gasping for air. 

Police and firefighters were transformed before our very eyes into the every day heroes they had always been. Politicians linked hands across the aisle. We no longer saw those who disagree with us over trivial matters as enemies. We had a real enemy. And we were more united than ever. If only we remembered. 

For several weeks, people across the country would gather, linking arms vowing to never stop until justice was served. Our resolve as a nation had never been stronger. They woke a sleeping giant we thought. We will make them pay was another phrase echoed from sea to shining sea. If only we remembered. 

But those weeks would turn to months, and months would turn to years. With every passing anniversary we would vow yet again to “never forget.” Perhaps I’m a pessimist but it sure looks like we don’t have as good a memory as we claim.

But what would happen if we actually remembered?

How would life be different if we remembered on October 1 or February 12 or May 7 or any day for that matter? What would be different if we actually remembered the gut punch we felt on September 11, 2001? What would be different if we as a people stood together the way we did on September 12, 2001?

The answer is simple.

We would be strong. We would be fearless. We would be a beacon of hope. We would be a refuge to the weary. We would be united. And there would be no doubt in anyone’s mind exactly who we were. If only we remembered. 

It’s ok to post your tower pic. It’s ok to reflect on where we’ve been. It’s ok to shed a tear but perhaps instead of any of these things we could actually remember. We could stand next to someone who doesn’t see eye to eye with us and realize that’s what made this nation great. A common ground for uncommon thoughts. A safe haven for the oppressed. A powerhouse renowned around the world.

Perhaps instead of saying we remember, we could actually remember. We could live the September 12th life again. Perhaps we can be the people our pictures reflect.

If only we remembered.

Square Pegs in a Round World

Ever feel like you’re the odd one out? Like no matter how hard you try, you just don’t fit into the mold everyone else seems to slide into so easily? Welcome to the life of a square peg in a round world. And guess what? That’s not just okay—it’s freaking fantastic.

I recently received this pen and immediately my mind started racing. There’s power in being a square peg or in this case pen. This thing won’t roll off my table. It won’t get lost under my desk. But more importantly it’s different which means it reminds me a little bit of myself.

Let’s get one thing straight: fitting in is overrated. And this is coming from a guy who used to bow to the masses and care what the world had to say. I was soft around the edges and tried to fit in and never stand out. But that is no longer who I am. There’s too much to lose by giving in to the powers of culture and society.

Society loves to push this idea that you’ve got to blend in, conform, and smooth out your edges to fit the round hole the world has carved out for you. But what if those edges are what make you, you? What if shaving them off means losing the very thing that makes you unique? Too many people spend their lives sanding down their differences just to be accepted, only to wake up one day and realize they’ve become a dull, lifeless version of themselves that looks like just about everyone around them!

And for what? A fleeting sense of belonging? Totally not worth it.

Standing out because you’re different isn’t a curse—it’s a blessing. It’s your golden ticket to a life that’s unapologetically authentic. So what if you don’t fit in? Who wants to be a carbon copy anyway? Square pegs don’t just follow the path—they carve out new ones. They push boundaries, sometimes break the rules, and even redefine what’s possible. Being a misfit means you’ve got the guts to be true to yourself in a world that’s constantly trying to make you someone else.

The beauty of being a square peg is that eventually, you find your people. The ones who aren’t interested in fitting into the round holes either. You know, the ones who don’t just tolerate your differences but celebrate them. When square pegs come together, they form a tribe that’s unbreakable. A community of people who get it—who get you. And let me tell you, there’s nothing more rewarding than finding those who stand out just like you do. It’s like finding a breath of fresh air in a world that often feels suffocating.

And here’s the kicker: when you embrace your square-pegness, you give others permission to do the same. You become a beacon for other misfits, showing them that it’s not just okay to be different—it’s powerful. Your willingness to stand out becomes a rallying cry for those who’ve been hiding their true selves, afraid to let the world see their sharp edges. You become a leader, not by blending in, but by standing up for what you believe and standing out no matter how much the world around you tries to shave your edges down.

So, stop trying to fit into a mold that was never meant for you. Stop sanding down your edges just to squeeze into a place that doesn’t appreciate your true shape. Own your square peg status. Embrace it. Because when you do, you’ll find a world full of other square pegs who are ready to stand out with you.

And trust me, that’s a world worth living in.

Be bold. Be different. Be the square peg that refuses to fit in.

It’s Not What They Told Me

From the time I was in 6th grade it’s all I wanted to do. Most boys at that age wanted to save the world by being police officers or fire fighters or even join the military. Not me. I didn’t see myself fitting those roles. For me all I ever wanted to do was what I do right now. But all too often it’s not what I was told it would be.

Many joke about it being nice to only work one day a week. Others sit back curiously wondering what it is that I really do. Still others really just don’t care as long as Sunday goes ok and I’m there when their emergency hits. But all too often it’s not what I was told it would be.

No one told me the weight I would have to carry. No one told me the microscope people would put me under. No one told me that real, caring, life-giving friendships would be hard to find, if not downright impossible at times. No one told me how much it would hurt some days, only how rewarding others would be.

You see I knew that I would be there when the phone rang. I knew that I would be there when you were at your worst. I knew that I’d see some dark and somewhat terrifying things. But all too often it’s not what I was told it would be.

I’ll never forget the feeling of holding her hand while she struggled for her final breaths. Pushing down tears of my own because I cared for her more than I could let on. Swallowing hard so I could speak coherently to provide some form of comfort to you as you now say good bye, all the while saying goodbye quietly myself. This isn’t how I was told it would be.

I’ll never forget cleaning up after him when he thought there was no other way out. Seeing someone I cared about end it all that way and try to preserve his dignity by quietly carrying the demons that secretly broke him. This isn’t how I was told it would be.

I’ll never forget sitting there as you broke into so many pieces. I wanted to help put it together but I was powerless. All I could do was sit, pray, and be a shoulder you could cry on. This isn’t how I was told it would be.

I’ll never forget when in a moment of rage you threw the tissue box at me across my desk. You were angry with something or someone but I was the easiest target because I was there. Or the time I was belittled and cursed at for doing my job because you assumed my intent – all this by those who care and without apology nonetheless. This isn’t how I was told it would be.

I could list countless moments that caught me off guard. Relationships that broke fast enough to give anyone whiplash. I could gripe and moan and complain but that’s not who I am.

Some of you will think this is a cry for help, but it’s not that at all. Others will think he’s just being a baby stop complaining, but that’s not it either. The greater point is this. We’re people. It’s really that simple.

I talk to a lot of pastors in my role these days and there’s so much hurt that could be avoided. Offenses given but no apology offered. Those moments provide lasting hurt. Many of us have scars that we see daily but will never reveal to anyone. We’re people. It’s really that simple.

Your pastor isn’t superman. He’s not invincible. He breaks. He hurts. He remembers every single one of those moments. Each of those scars he’ll carry to his grave. He’s not doing it for accolades or praise. He’s doing it because he cares. He cares for you. And sometimes caring means he has to say and do some things you don’t like. But we’re people. It’s really that simple.

It often isn’t what I was told it would be. But I don’t do it for me. And to be honest I don’t do it for you either. The real reason we carry these scars and walk with these weights is because we were called to this work. No other reason would be strong enough to keep us anchored this long.

You can question the outcomes or even the steps we take. You can dislike the way it makes you feel. But just remember we’re people, it’s really that easy.

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